Until You

Chapter Seven

Ethan was visibly absent from his home. Days turned into weeks, and weeks turned into an entire month without him. As the days progressed, Gretchen couldn't help but think that Ethan wasn't only avoiding her, but that he had also chosen to take leave of his own home. Ethan's behavior didn't make sense to Gretchen, and it didn't matter how many sleepless nights she spent trying to figure out what it was she had said that pushed him so far off the edge even to the extent of leaving, she just couldn't.

She remembered the last words he spoke to her before his disappearance – his warning that she rid herself of every foolish notion of taking the place of his missing wife – and it did nothing but confuse her further. She didn't feel anything for Ethan. Sure, she found him attractive – as would any woman with eyes – but she was only just coming out of a complicated past after making a terrible decision of turning down Matthew's proposal and going the extra mile of trying to destroy his marriage. She had moved past the notion of love ever finding her and had even convinced herself that she was undeserving of love; it was the sole reason that she poured all of her time into caring for the rapidly growing Ellie who had now perfected the art of crawling, and who had managed to gain weight because she ate better and slept better.

Finding her stay in Williams' estate to be dreadfully boring and lonely, she had reached out to Matthew in her boredom. She had managed to keep the tone of her letter formal, even if she still longed for Matthew's presence. Perhaps she was doomed to always be in love with a man who had found love somewhere else?

Mustering what was left of her courage, she went over the letter a few more times to ensure her silly emotions had remained concealed by her formal words, before handing it over to the footman to deliver in the post office.

She imagined the letter would take a few days to arrive its destination, but she couldn't help but feel abandoned as the days progressed and she still didn't get a response.

Desperate for a distraction, she had a maid teach her how to properly change Ellie's diapers and clothes. When staying indoors became dreadfully dull, she found a perfect spot in the garden for Ellie to play in the grass while she got lost in a novel for a few hours every evening. Once the time for dinner drew close, she would take Ellie back into the building and they would have their dinner together, after which Ellie would quickly fall asleep.

Unable to find rest after her dreadfully boring day, she would sit up all night fantasizing about her own happy ending. She knew she was undeserving of one, but it didn't stop her from desiring one.

Even now, as she lay with the grass pricking her skin through the fabric of her borrowed yellow dress, she found herself lost in the life of the protagonist once more.

Putting the book aside, she glanced up just in time to catch Ellie trying to put a leaf in her mouth.

"Ellie!" She sprang to her feet, the book falling to the grass as she raced to the infant who was now chewing on the leaf. "I take my eyes off of you for a few seconds and you're off eating grass!" she scolded, leaning down to wrestle the leaf from the infant's hands.

Visibly upset, Ellie let out a loud cry.

She sighed. "This just goes to say how hungry you must be. Here, let's go in and get dinner."

Gathering the wailing child into her arms, she turned and began making her way back to the mansion. Once inside, she made her way to the nursery and placed Ellie on the changing table. Turning to the armoire, she found a clean diaper and dress. Once she had succeeded in changing Ellie, she lifted her off of the changing table and turned to leave the room, pausing in her tracks when the door was suddenly pushed open to reveal Ethan.