T A K E A S T E P B A C K

⏸O N C E⏸

Another day of constant physical and emotional bullying. Isaiah got sick and Jahseh and this Asian dude abused me all day. I think they call him Ming or something like that. It doesn't really matter. They just slammed my arm in my locker and spit on me and called me names and all that.

I sat against my locker and put my knees up to my chest. They've been bullying me for weeks now and this has to be the worst. What else are they going to do? Run me over with their car?

I didn't cry. I was too angry to cry. Too tired to cry. I got up and went home, letting my self bleed from my arm. I walked home to see Isaiah laying in the same spot he was this morning after he threw up. He was dead sleep and drooling on my pillows.

I went into the bathroom and took off my shirt and wrapped up my cut and bruise from the locker. I washed my face and put a long sleeve shirt on. I got in the bed and I wrapped my arm around Isaiah and fell asleep against him.

I woke up to Isaiah shaking me. It was still day out and it burned my eyes a little.

"Okay. Okay I'm awake," I said and he just frowned at me.

"What the hell happened?", he asked holding up my arm with the bandage on it. How did he see this?

"Nothing," I said knowing what he was going to do. He was going to beat the crap out of them both and get expelled, "If you do something can't you just do it off campus?"

He sighed irritated with me, "It was Jahseh and Ming," I said and he growled and got up.

"Isaiah wait," I said as he put his shoes on.

"I'm not going. I can't leave you here alone," he whispered to himself. I frowned. What does he mean leaving?

"What are you talking about?", I asked and he stopped and looked at me.

"My grandfather. He died. My mom and I are moving back to New York," he said and my heart dropped. I nodded swallowing this knot in my throats and he just stared at me.

"You should go take care of your mom," I said and he shook his head.

"Not if you're getting hurt," Isaiah protested.

"I'm not as important as she is. Take care of her," I wanted to cry now. Not just because of Isaiah leaving, but because now I was vulnerable. They would torture me until I ended it myself.

Why can't Jahseh just get over the fact that he was moving a little too fast for me? I barely talked to the dude and then he tells me he's going to fuck me and tried to kiss me. Now he's angry because I wouldn't become some desperate lil bitch.

"Stop crying," Isaiah said wiping my tears. I got on my knees and moved toward him giving him a hug, "I love you," he whispered into my ear. I paused.

"I love you too," I said kissing his cheek.

"Please don't cry," he said and I wiped my eyes and looked at him, "I ain't gonna let them hurt you."

"How? You'll be more than 100 miles away," I said sniffling. He just laid my head on his chest and he stayed silent as he turned on my favorite show. I got him into it somehow and he won't let me watch it without him. 

"Just relax. I want you to be happy. With or without me. If that means beating they ass until they bleed to keep you safe, that's what I'm going to do," he said and I nodded. I played with his fingers as he watched the show.

I'm going to miss this a lot. Laying next to Isaiah watching Netflix. Playing in his hair or kissing him. I'm going to miss being in love. Now I know why people complain so much when they break up. It hurts, even when you aren't apart.

"I'm leaving this Friday," he said and I nodded.

"I'll help you pack if you need me to," he hummed and laid down accidentally hitting his head on the wall the bed was against. I laughed as he groaned.

"Aw big baby," I cooed and he laughed at me. I kissed the top of his head and he turned around to lay on a pillow.

I laid on his chest and fell asleep quickly as I listened to his heartbeat.

[omg noooo. Why Wifi gotta leave her like dat?]