The Inglorious Basterds

Chapter 1

"Are you done?" The Nazi officer, Christoph, asked, blue eyes dark with annoyance and anger.

"Sir, with all due respect, if you left me alone I'd get this fixed faster."

The man squinted his eyes at the 'soldier'.

"Are you back talking a superior officer?"

The soldier, a woman known by the nickname 'The Two Toned German', straightened and saluted him.

"No, sir. I'm not."

The man gestured for her to continue in fixing their truck. Stuck on the edge of a forest and large meadow, the sun provided low levels of light. Despite this factor, smoke, black and thick with problems, spiraled through the air. The truck was stuck and one person would never be enough to fix it. How naive they were.

Four men surrounded the truck, keeping 'guard' as the woman worked. Three others had gone deeper into the forest for some unknown reason. Probably an excuse to smoke or drink on the job.

"Alright. FALL IN!"

The woman quickly straightened and turned, standing at attention. The four men ran in, standing in line and at attention. They stared forward, awaiting the words from their commanding officer.

Before he could speak, a click came from behind him. The soldiers sprung into action as soon as they saw a figure behind their commanding officer.

"Tell 'em to stay in line."

"Stay in line!" Christoph stated as a yell. The soldiers hesitantly backed up into formation.

"Tell 'em I'm in charge of 'em now. If you feel like playing hero, I have twenty five men with guns aimed this way. You can either hand 'em to me or die and automatically resign them up."

Christoph mentally weighed his options. Either one ended with his troop getting taken away from him, but he was still extremely loyal to Hitler. He turned around and came face to face with a gun. His eyes trailed up to the man, American by look as much as speech.

"I now hand you over to..."

"I'm assuming you just said you're handing them to me, in which case Aldo Raine. Lieutenant Aldo Raine. But, if you didn't, which I'll know about, you're going to die for your country. Now's your chance to correct yourself if needed."

"I now hand you over to lieutenant Aldo Raine."

"Come out!" Aldo called behind him.

From the treeline emerged dozens of soldiers. They all began to walk over as nonchalantly as possible for the situation.

Aldo shoved the commander behind him and smiled at the five soldiers in line.

"As you heard, I'm in control. My first order is to point out who the two toned German is."

The soldiers exchanged a look and noticeably shifted in discomfort. The woman was feeling hot all of a sudden.

A soldier suddenly broke formation and ran for it. He was shot in the leg as quickly as he took off, and a boot landed on his skull a few times afterwards. Bits of blood and brain sailed through the air.

"Thanks, Hugo." Aldo raised a hand as a thanking gesture. "Now, if anyone else thinks running is a good idea, let that be an insentive not to."

Aldo began to walk down the line of soldiers, starting furthest from the truck.

"I don't know if you can understand me or not, but judging from your reactions you can hear me just fine." He stopped and looked directly at the woman. "If I'm wrong, feel free to speak up." A smaller smile graced his lips. "You don't see many female soldiers, I have to commend you." His eyes glanced down to her uniform. "I don't see any badges or insignias. Can you speak English?"

She stared at him, fear threatening to show. She exhaled slowly.

"Yes."

"Yes what?"

"Yes, sir."

Her voice was British as she spoke English, a vast difference to her German sounding voice earlier.

"Do you know who I'm looking for-?"

"It's that bitch. She's the one you're looking for, please let us go!" The soldier next to her stated quickly, earning a loud laugh from a majority of the Basterds.

"That's her." A Basterd stated to Aldo, walking forward from the forest.

The woman sent a glare to the man beside her and then looked back to Aldo. Her body jerked as if about to run.

"Are you her?"

"I am."

"What's your name little lady?"

"Jane HampBurg. I prefer my mother's surname, Richards, though."

"Are you the two toned German?"

"Yes."

Aldo grinned widely.

"We're fans of your work. Well, what's left of it. Also how you avoided death. There's rumors saying you were forced to work with the Nazis, are they true?"

She nodded ever so slightly, worried that may be the wrong answer.

Aldo placed an arm around her shoulders and began to walk her into the forest.

"Well, we have a plan-" He was cut off by dozens of gunshots. "And it involves you."