The Mafia Boss's Possession

Chapter 19

Just so you guys can understand a bit better why Carson did what he did. Also, my prayers are with those victims of hurricanes. It most definitely is something devastating that is destroying many homes, so I feel for those.

Carson's P.O.V.

I watched as Ayva's small body was hugged by Silvano, anger coiling through me, but the way her delicate shoulders shook with her cries reminded me that I had driven her to that state. 

They finally pulled away and I saw Silvano say something to her before she nodded and got inside the Escalade. I felt my heart constrict knowing that she was actually leaving, and then I remembered her precious words. 

"I love you, Carson."

I could replay those words over and over, but I couldn't bear hearing them while remembering her tears. I wanted to pull her against me and stop her crying, but I had already made a deal with myself. 

My world was far too dangerous for her. I had almost lost her once, and I wasn't planning on it happening again. I had seen what happened to her, and I was one to blame. She was losing herself, she was far too precious for me to keep her locked up in my dark world. She was destroyed, and I had seen the physical damage that those bastards did to her, but it was the emotional one that was destroying her, and while I wanted to blame the men that kept her there, I also knew that if was my fault for keeping her, and for letting her become something so special to me. Now, anyone who wanted to bring me down or hurt me, they could do so easily by taking my sweet Ayva. 

It hurt to have to take her in my arms after she'd been put through so much, and for her to have gone through all of that just to protect me because she loved me, it was dangerous. It was dangerous for her to love me just like it was dangerous for me to love her. If I had truly lost her, if those fucking bastards ended her life, I would never forgive myself for losing something so valuable. 

That's why I sent her away. If she left and started a new life away from me, away from this cruel world that would take away her light, I could feel better knowing that she was safer without me. Although it pained me greatly to see her shed tears for a monster like myself, I felt better knowing that it would be easier for her to move on if she hated me than if she loved me. I didn't want any other male to look at her with love and lust, and for her to do the same with him, but any man who could keep her away from this darkness was already better than me.

"What the fuck did you do to her?!" Silvano stormed in, slamming the door shut behind him. 

I looked at him, his eyes raging and his hands fisted. "Why the hell do you care?" I narrowed my eyes at him, curious for the amount of concern he had for her. 

"Carson," he used used my first name, his hands removed the fists and he ran one down his face. "She's broken, she's devastated and needs someone to hold her and com-"

"You were doing a pretty good job at that, don't you think?" I spat at him, letting the anger I had against myself and directing it towards him. "I saw you out there." I walked over to my alcohol cabinet and pulled out a whiskey bottle and a glass, pouring myself a drink.

"Yeah, well, I decided to be the man that you weren't." He challenged and I raised my eyes towards him,  feeling a hatred spread through me, only thing was that I didn't hate him, I hated myself because what he said was true. While I will never admit it, it was true. I could never be the man that she needed. I gulped down the drink before nearing him, my eyes shooting glares at him as he stood in front of me. 

"Don't you fucking talk abou-"

"Don't you fucking lecture me!" Silvano growled back and I didn't hold my fist anymore.