IV. Church Bells

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Too soon do I find myself standing in front of the mirror in my room. Mum is still adjusting my wedding dress, humming a song that contrasts with her stressed out heart. Judy is sitting on my bed, her feet dangling and her hands tucking the flowers of the bouquet neatly in order. She picked them earlier in the morning.

I can't tear away my eyes from the image of my reflection. I look like I stepped right out of a bridal magazine. I am wearing a white dress, with lace sleeves and a laced neckline. The bodice is tight around my flat chest and gives the illusion that somewhere beneath the fabric, there might actually be a pair of breasts. The skirt flares open and rests against the wooden floor. The sleeves end at my wrist, leaving barely any skin open to breath. In the humid bayou air, I am already sweating at the thought of leaving my somewhat cool room.

My hair is tucked low in a bun at the nape of my neck, a few stubborn strands escaping at the front and framing my face. My mum had given up to try to pin them with bobby pins.

Irène walks into the room, a hat box in her gloved hands. She is wearing a lovely bright yellow dress that contrasts just so nicely with her dark hair. She puts it down and quickly retrieves a thin veil. Careful not to fall over mum who's squatting on the floor, adjusting the last bits and pieces, Irène tripples around and carefully start pinning the veil on top of my head, letting the thin fabric cascade onto my back.

After what seems like hours, my mother finally looks pleased at my presence.

"Reed is a lucky man." She says as she leans in closer to give me a peck on my cheek.

"I know." I fake bravery as I grin at my image. Somehow the white dress makes this entire wedding feel even more unrealistic. It is a gorgeous dress and I hate myself for not having the warm feelings that it deserves.

Judy hops of the bed and hands me the flowers. The four of us stare at my reflection in silence. I wonder what's going through everybody's heads when a knock interrupts us. For a second I fear my father is already here, ready to hand me over to my groom. Instead, Michael appears in the doorway wearing a smug smile on his face.

"Look at you." He says and finally steps into my small room completely. I don't care about my dress, or the veil or the flowers. I rush to my older brother and crush him in an embrace. He has come all the way down from Amite to be present at my wedding. It must have taken him almost four days to get here. He smells odd, unlike how the people in Eauville do. We smell like wetland, heavy scents of citrus trying to push away the salty scent of the water that surrounds us. Michael smells fresh, like early morning dew and freshly washed vegetables. He smells like mint and other fine herbs.

"Seems like you've missed me." He grins and I can feel his chuckle vibrate in his chest. My older brother was my best friend when we grew up. He thought me all the important things like shooting at glass bottles with a rubber band, or the most colorful curse words no lady should use.

"I am happy you're here." I admit and look up into his warm brown familiar eyes. He seems even taller than the last time I saw him. He's wearing his uniform, a dark blue tunic with a royal green sash, decorated with golden rims. The emblem on his shoulder tells his home is in Curker County, as the pelican on a pink background shows.

His hair is cut short and his sideburns neatly trimmed. He looks at me amused. "The uniform has that effect on the ladies."

In response I roll my eyes. Before we can really catch up, father walks in.

"I will have to ask the lot of you to leave." He declares formally, holding open the door for the rest of the Mcgoldnicks to leave.

When we're alone, he turns to me and takes in the image. He smiles but his eyes look sad. A sudden pang of guilt knots in my chest. I realize my father doesn't want this either, but we can't afford to pay a fee similar to aunt Mabel's a second time.

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