30 reasons to stay || piszczek

reason thirty

6 July 2017.

It wasn't supposed to end this way.

Rosie was supposed to wake up in Lukasz's arms this morning. He would be snoring away, his arms wrapped protectively around her small body, naked or clothed, and the tip of his nose just barely touching hers.

And when they wake up, in each other's embrace, Lukasz would kiss Rosie gently on the lips as her eyes flutter open. He would greet her good morning, and ask if she slept well, and if she said she didn't, he'd listen to her mumblings starting at one point and ended up in a completely different topic. This is how it had always been for Rosie and Lukasz, the morning after their anniversary day.

Except today, Rosie wakes up alone. Lukasz is no longer in her embrace, his body missing from her comfort as everything begins to come together in her head.

Just by the thought of it, it makes her want to bury her face in the pillow and cry. She can't believe it.

After eight years, you'd be expected to be in a relationship that couldn't possibly end, right? Rosie really thought it was going to be forever with Lukasz because he was the only man she could ever love, even through the tough walls of her calloused heart and her cautious head, he is the only man to ever witness her in her purest form.

She loves this man. She loves the scars that lay on his skin, his big nose, his picture-taking habit, the way his hair looks every morning and every night after a long day, the date night no matter how late at night it is, and the way her heart feels when he intertwines their hands together—she has loved everything about Lukasz for eight years only for it to lead to nothing but heartache on both of their parts.

But after everything that's happened within the past thirty days—the arguments, the I'm sorry I love yous, the highs and the lows, and the really, really lows—it all came to both of their breaking points.

No matter how much she loved Lukasz, her heart was just so tired of all these injuries, and it was causing her a pain felt both emotionally and physically.

She hadn't thought about the decision long before telling it to Lukasz last night, but it seemed like the right one. After all, maybe she did need a break. From him, from relationships, from the world. But it just happened that she's only ever truly happy when she's with Lukasz.

If there's something preventing the break up between the two, she's take it. She'd take anything that would persuade her no to break up Lukasz, but frankly, there isn't anything.

Rosie sits up and heads to the bathroom, taking her cell phone along with her. She sighs as she looks at her herself in the mirror, and it's like she doesn't know who the reflection is. Is she even doing the right decision? She doesn't really know anymore.

As she scrolls through her phone, she find that Lukasz had left her a voicemail at three o'clock in the morning, nearly four hours ago. Her eyebrows knit together when she sees it. What? Did he really leave that long ago?

Regardless, she listens to it.

"Hi, Rosie. I don't know when or if you're going to listen to this, but it's three in the morning right now, I can stop thinking about everything.

Are we really going to break up? Eight years later, the day following our anniversary? I don't know. For I all know, you could have just ended things right there, as I crawled into your embrace with your arms around me

But before we go our separate ways, I want to tell you a few things:

Remember when we first met? At Jonas' stupid house party where we decided to ditch it and go get street food while roaming around the streets of Berlin like a bunch of teenagers? During that moment, I knew I liked you. And then on our first date just the day after, I fell in love with you. I didn't know it was possible—to fall in love with a person that you only knew for a day, but you, Rosie, are most amazing and breathtaking person I have ever met, I'm so incredibly glad I did.