Orange Tosser ✔️

2: Deep Changes

Rebecca

You have received a message from TT.

Why is it that I always laugh when I read his username?

From: TT
"I can't believe I'm saying this, but you were right. I did get hit in the head again."

To: TT
From: B
"So, did you find out who your mystery person is yet?"

From: TT
"No, Orange Tosser hasn't been found yet. But I do believe it is a girl now, seeing as it was only girls at the table."

To: TT
From: B
"Now you believe me..."

From: TT
"Yes, I believe you now. Hey, do you happen to know any of the people at the table?"

To: TT
From: B
"Yes, why? I'm not giving you their numbers, vice versa."

From: TT
"For once, I'm not looking for numbers."

To: TT
From: B
"Then what're you looking for?"

From: TT
"Names. Do you know their names?"

To: TT
From: B
"That's all I really know, their names."

From: TT
"You don't get out much, do ya?"

To: TT
From: B
"On second thought, I don't know their names.."

From: TT
"Wait! I'm sorry."

To: TT
From: B
"You're so desperate. I think the people at the table are Lily Schneider, Nikita Something, Emerson Wellner, Rebecca Nelson, and those other three. I don't exactly know every name."

From: TT
"Why have I never heard those names before?"

I rolled my eyes, a small smile on my face.

To: TT
From: B
"Maybe because you only pay attention to the popular girls and never take one look at anyone below that social class?"

From: TT
"Way to make me look like the bad guy."

To: TT
From: B
"You are the bad guy."

From: TT
"What, how?!"

To: TT
From: B
"Let's see. The countless amounts of heartbroken girls that STILL lovingly stare at you in the hallways, the death glares from the guys in the halls that want to be you. The flinching from the smarter boys that steer far away from you because of your threats. The annoyed teachers from your remarks back at them, multiple detentions, and constantly being late."

From: TT
"Uh."

To: TT
From: B
"Do I need to go on?"

From: TT
"No, I get it. But it's just who I am."

To: TT
From: B
"So if that's REALLY, TRULY, who you are. Then I must be Beyoncé."

Shutting off my phone, I sigh, and look towards my dresser. My camera sits there, the strap still hanging off the edge. I hadn't touched it, in weeks. I glance back at my picture wall, seeing multiple pictures of Emerson and I, a few scattered ones of scenery, and a few of my aunt and I.

Photography was my escape from all the bad things in life. I liked to take black and white photos, specifically. They hid color, but held so much emotion. They hid imperfections, but expressed so many things. Pictures, small little squares and rectangles. For photo shoots, they are planned, the props are given, and they tell you how to pose. When I take my own pictures, they are just free to do whatever happens. I don't command a pencil to look still on a piece of paper with a quote neatly written on it. I don't tell a bird to hover in one place, and stay still so I can get the perfect shot.

The way it shall be seen by the eyes, is the way it shall be seen by the camera. Raw, emotional, expressive.

From: TT
"Why do you think that I'm someone else?"

The one question that everyone asks.

To: TT
From: B
"Like I said, I'm very observant. I see past the expressions on faces, I see past the posture, behavior, practically everything. Even if it's one look in the eyes, I still see something different."

From: TT
"Why are your going so deep? Like that poetic stuff?"

To: TT
From: B
"If you're going to question how I view things, kindly don't ask for my help again."

From: TT
"Fine. I won't question anymore. I can't afford to loose you now."

Huh?

To: TT
From: B
"Who's getting deeper now?"

From: TT
"You help me too much with stuff in school, that if I don't have someone to talk to, I might go insane."

To: TT
From: B
"Maybe going insane will shine some light on you. Try it."

It was true. When my parents died, I closed up. I wouldn't talk, I only ate if I needed to, I wouldn't leave my room unless I had to. Sometimes I wouldn't talk to Emerson, I wouldn't do much. A few months after they died, my aunt got me this camera. She shoved me out the door, and told me to go make some magic. I took about 87 pictures that day.

From: TT
"How will going insane help me?"

To: TT
From: B
"It helped me."

From: TT
"How? What happened to you?"

To: TT
From: B
"This isn't about me. Insanity can do many things. Give it a shot, where's the harm in that?"

From: TT
"What if it permanently changes me?"

To: TT
From: B
"Then wait for a reason why."

Permanent change, something everyone could strive for.

'I've permanently changed my personality.'

'I've changed my hair to its natural color.'

'I've changed my way of living, because being bright, and happy all the time, it wasn't worth the faking.'

Good or bad, it needs to happen sometimes.

Even when it's good, it's still bad in some way.

Even when it's bad, it's still good in some way.

Change, the good, the bad, and the different. Change.