IMPORTANT! Please see Author's Notes at the end of the chapter.
Tsuna was getting better- he tells himself that every day.
Sure, maybe he still can't sleep past 4 am except for that one time. Maybe he still gets flashbacks. Maybe heat still feels like they're eating his hands raw.
But he's getting better because nothing happened in the first place.
Tsuna touches things, ignoring the pain that shoots up whenever he does. The heat isn't there, he tells himself frantically, it's never been there. So Tsuna doesn't bother cooling his hands because that'd be pointless.
It gets hotter and hotter and hotter until tears start to form in his eyes and keeping a smile gets harder than it already is. But Tsuna doesn't stop- he keeps going.
Because he's going to get better. Not even the heat could stop him.
---
"Hey, Reborn," Tsuna calls for the hitman's attention, one sunny Sunday morning. "What's the best way to dispose of clothing?"
Reborn raises a perfect eyebrow and Tsuna wonders how he does that. He's a toddler.
After half a second of thinking, Reborn replies. "Burn them." He says in the most Reborn-like way with the most Reborn-like answer. Tsuna knows that but that doesn't stop the heat from crawling at the thought of fire.
His breathing hitches for only a second and Tsuna congratulates himself for not falling into a panic attack.
Innocent question. An innocent (?) response.
Inhale. Hold. Exhale.
Ignoring the fact that he was silent for more than 10 seconds, Tsuna laughs. "Wow, okay, I should've expected that." He shakes his head. "No, but how about another way other than burning?"
Reborn shrugs, his gaze hidden by the shadows of his fedora. "That's how I usually get rid of my clothing." The hitman says nonchalantly. "Y'know to make sure all evidence is completely gone."
Is he doing this on purpose? Tsuna thought, his hands forming into fists. The heat starts to build up even more.
"How about you give them to charity?" The way Reborn had suggested it was in a condescending way that made Tsuna nearly miss what he said entirely.
He blinks. "Hey. That's actually not such a bad idea." He stood up from his spot on the ground to move to his closet.
At the very back were his green hoodie and yellow shirt from that day. They were thrown in hastily to the back of his closet. Tsuna didn't want anything to do with them, however now, the simple thought of knowing they were in there was enough to make his skin crawl.
He grabs them with his hands- because that's what normal people do. His hands are getting so hot and Tsuna wants to bury them in ice– but he doesn't because people don't nurse their perfectly uninjured hands with ice.
Reborn wasn't even trying to be subtle with his staring. Tsuna pretends not to notice him.
---
They know. It was one of his greatest fears. He fears them knowing his messed up thoughts, his suffocating emotions. He fears that they are sneering at him behind those smiles.
Weak, they would spat out in disgust.
Tsuna stares at the boy in the reflection. He's grown to despise him. No matter how hard Tsuna tries, the boy never smiles, never gets better–
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Of Warm Hands Hidden (KHR FANFIC)
Fanfiction"You haven't been the same." It was blunt and straight to the point. Tsuna felt cornered but there was a sense of acceptance in him anyway. Of course, he hasn't been the same. His hands didn't always feel searing hot. His chest didn't always feel so...
