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~2| CHAPTER~

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DON'T SAY ANYTHING.

Just agree.

Keep quiet.

My mother's voice rang through my head as I stared out the window, taking the scene of trees as they passed by. One by one. Each stood tall. Undisturbed.

My parents sat up front- tension reeking out of them as mother mumbled small scatter stuff to herself, looking at her nails.

Don't say anything.

I knew why she said that.

The Conversion had changed me.

I had never been the same since that day, a year ago.

My parents knew it.

I knew it.

And those who heard my talk, just a few words out of my mouth- knew it.

Just agree.

As in, just do what I was supposed to do and nod my head like the obedient piece of weight I should be. Nothing more but a figure- taking up air. Looking pretty. Not even looking if some could help it.

Keep quiet.

Because they didn't like what I had to say.

Because mother would press her hands to her ears, tears starting to form when I spoke. When I told them what I thought. When I told them what I would do to them.

Some girls come out of the Conversion fine.

Grateful even that the monster had been removed from their soul.

Some never come back at all.

They can't handle it. Can't withhold the pain and blinding world they are thrown into- the ripping of their soul as part of it dies.

And some.

Very few but some.

Don't come back the same.

Like a vase that has been shattered- poorly glued together.

Like a flower that has been snapped in half, the stem tapped to hold, but the stalk slowly dying.

Some come back with less of their mind.

With chaos in their heart and darkness in their soul.

I am those some.

That is me.

***

The drive was long.

Too long.

I stare at my father from the back, waiting for him to suggest we stop for lunch.

He notices my eyes but continues to ignore them.

I sigh.

No lunch then.

Mom is the first to break the long silence.

"Remember to not talk."

I stare at her. She is only able to hold my eyes for a few seconds before looking away, her face paling at whatever monster she saw lurking underneath.

She stays silent after that.

Father is not as compliant.

"If you ruin this deal, you'll be leaving your mother and me in some trouble."

I continue to stare out the window.

I didn't care about their trouble. What he really told me was, 'don't mess up this deal because I need the money.'

I don't know how, in the year that I was gone, they were able to become so financially in debt.

Probably father spending it on whatever he wanted. Mother agreeing silently in the background that he should get it, that of course, he should buy it.

Silence fell over us again as I followed through with what my mother had been telling me all week.

Stay quiet.

It's not like I didn't foresee this coming.

What else were they going to do with a daughter? They had no son to raise as a warrior, so the only option is to sell me to the highest bidder. This is just the way things are. The way life is done.

And the bidder we were driving to right now was a once in a lifetime chance for them.

Someone they had never in their wildest dreams thought possible to notice their daughters profile.

Maybe it was because I had waited so long. Delayed the inevitable outcome, therefore cursing me to an even more condemning fate.

Because we were driving to go bargain with the Wolf King. 



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