Crimson Illusion

Crimson Illusion-Chapter 9- Open your eyes

-Sometimes if you let something fall apart first it's easier to put it back together.

-Krasnoyarsk, early in the morning, a lone chapel

I have never, in all my life, entered a church, or a chapel or any other religious building. I have never, in all my life, been religious. Well, except for a few times, in the dead hours of the night. When I was still a little boy and had hope of my parents retuning for me some day. I would stay awake, in the room next to Dimitri’s listening wearily for any signs of activity in the house or around the compound.

When I was absolutely positive that no one was around, I would get out of my bed and get in a pose next to it, my knees on the floor and my elbows on the matrass. I saw the position on the television many times and I thought to myself, why not? When all of the people on the television did it, their wishes came true.

So I had hope. Maybe my wishes would come true. Maybe my parents would come back for me. Maybe I’d be happy again.

But in reality, nothing happened. Every night I spent kneeling on my floor, crying and sending my prayers out to some being I didn’t even have proof existed, I could have spent making my thoughts more rational, more firm.

I guess I couldn’t blame my younger self though. I was a little boy then. But that did teach me about some things that should not be tested as they waste too much time.

So no. I have never been in a church nor have I ever read the Bible. I also have never been religious at all, that is, I never believed in God. Maybe God did exist. Maybe not. But I was pretty sure that even if there was a God, he or she already gave up on the people on Earth as a failed experiment.

And here I am. Sitting on the cold, hard chapel bench, looking at the stature of a man with his hands and feet nailed to a cross. His head slightly tilted to the side. Around his head he had a thorn crown and a beard. He didn’t look like someone who fought that much, but if people did this to him, I guessed he must’ve done something horrible.

And he must’ve done something very good too, for today’s people to be praying to him and worshipping him the way they do. Honestly, I couldn’t see why someone would put their fate into someone they didn’t even know existed.

But I guessed I didn’t have the right to judge as I blindly followed my Alpha as a lost puppy for many years before coming to my senses.

I didn’t know why I came here in the first place. And to be quite honest, I didn’t want to know why I did so. There was something that drew me here, but I could say with certainty that it wasn’t the search for religion or guidance.

Maybe the search for peace?

The small chapel or church, whatever it was, was barren of any other people except me. It was quiet, darkness still covering the town. The sun would be coming up in a few more hours and it wasn’t like the sun would give any life to the town.

There was a presence next to me and I recognized the scent to be Brock. The big man sat down and put his hands on the bench in front of him. I would’ve thought that he was praying until he spoke to me.

“I didn’t think you were this early of a riser.” He murmured, his voice barely a crack in the silence before he leaned his head on his arms and closed his eyes.

“I’m usually not. I don’t know what my deal is this morning.” I murmured back.

Between the two of us, man would think that we were afraid to speak even a bit louder and risk disrupting the serenity of the place.