Battle Scars.

Your okay Pt. 1

Pov  Dipper.

I don't care what Bill is. He's my friend and I don't wanna lose that. He's the only person that I'm comfortable talking with. He doesn't seem that bad. I don't care what they say about Bill.

I see Mabel and I frown. I know I'm I'm trouble. We walked back to the shack in slicent.
Once she opened the door I ran up stairs and locked my door. Once I closed the door I sat down. My back was against the door and my knees were up to my chest. 

I've missed up.
What was I thinking?

"W-What was I thinking? " I said out loud.

I'm paranoid right now . I could just imagine what they're going to do to me. So what I get for sticking up for myself, sticking up for other. 

I just feel so alone , I just feel so afraid. I don't know what to feel anymore. I don't have any happy emotions, I'm just so scared.

" why did they even come here." I said tearing up.

Someone was aggressively knocking the door. I was so scared to speak, I couldn't even move at this point. I slowly scooted away from the door. The door opened and I see Ford.

I feel like my heart's beating out of my chest. I can barely breathe, I'm just shaking and shaking. Ford quickly closes a door and locks it.

"F-Ford I-I c-can explain. " I stuttered.
" You're such an idiot Dipper! Do you know how dangerous he is." Ford yelled.

I got up and looked at him .

" maybe I don't know how dangerous he is, but you have to understand that you can change. I don't care what he's like. He's nice to me and I couldn't ask for anything else. He accepted me as his friend and I don't care what you say!"
" you don't even know him! You don't know what he's done to this town. I don't care if you think he good you're not seeing him!" Ford said.
" shut up ! I don't care-" I yelled.

I I wasn't finished with my sentence and he slapped me across the face. I looked at him and the flashbacks came back so fast.

" Your an obnoxious piece of shit! " he said.
". . ." I didn't answer.
" I know what he's capable of. You don't know what I'm capable of, so you better watch your tone with me." Ford said.

He grabbed me by my collar and pulled me closer to him. I've never been this scared of someone before. He punched me in the stomach and dropped me. I was on the floor letting the tears escape my eyes.

"your never going to understand." Ford said kicking me in the stomach.
". . ." I just looked at him with tears.
"You better not see Bill again. If you do I'll fucking hurt you. " Ford said.
"h-he was r-right..." I whimpered.
"Don't even mention him. " Ford yelled.

He kicked me once more. I started to bleed and I just laid there.

"If you tell anyone about this even your sister I'll hurt them. " Ford said.

Nodded yes while sobbing. He unlocked the door and left. He closed and locked be door from the outside. I crawled to my bed and sat up.

I went to my drawers and took out the blade.

"for being useless,  for being stupid, for being here,  for being myself...."