Loving Taylor - Loving Bad Series (Sample of Published Book)

Chapter 4 - Part 1

A week later I was still trying to shake off the feelings that remained after the phone call with my mom. I had pushed through every day, refusing to allow it to consume me. A lot of people didn't have it easy so there was no excuse, no giving up. With every hurdle I had ever faced I confronted it head on, but this was different. There was no black and white so I had ignored it, hoping time would allow me to push it to the back of my mind.

I had ensured I kept busy. If I wasn't working on an assignment I was hanging out with Slater. The girls had been plentiful. Between girls shoving their number into my hands or openly vying for a place in my bed, I hadn't had a shortage of attention from the opposite sex.

Usually I wouldn't have thought twice. Girls gave me a temporary reprieve from my thoughts and being alone. They gave me much needed peace even if it was only for a few hours. But not this week; for some reason they didn't hold the same appeal that they had before.

I don't know what was wrong with me. The cute blonde who had given me her number with a suggestive wink on Monday hadn't done anything for me. Neither had the brunette who had invited me back to her place for a one-night stand Wednesday night when Slater and I had gone out.

I was still feeling unsettled when Slater suggested we go to a party on campus. Maybe that was what I needed to get me out of my rut. Loud music, lots of people and girls who could help me forget everything for a few blissful hours.

At the sound of the heavy thumping music I led the way into the party with Slater following behind us. I gave a brief nod to a few people I recognized as I made my way to the kitchen to get a drink.

"What do you want?" I asked Slater when I surveyed the options in the iced buckets.

"A beer."

I got two out and handed one to him. I twisted the top off and took a gulp. We went back out to the living room and I allowed my gaze to flit from one girl to another.

"See any you like?" Slater mused beside me.

"There are a couple with potential." I gave the one closest to us an appreciative look.

She in turn swept a seductive gaze over me. I gave her an inviting smile. She was attractive but there was something missing. I couldn't quite put my finger on it.

Get a grip, I told myself. Since meeting Taylor, I was looking at girls differently and I didn't like it one bit. I didn't want change, I wanted my life exactly how it had been before.

Girls and parties with some studying in between so I could prove I was more than just some fucked-up kid with a bad childhood who had inherited loads of money from a father who hadn't given a shit.

Just thinking about that darkened my mood.

"That girl is here," Slater said, nodding in the direction of the front door.

I was about to ask him which one when I caught sight of platinum-blond hair. My eyes focused on the girl who had been in my thoughts regularly since I had last seen her. She was talking to her friend, Jordan, with a drink in her hand.

Keep away, the alarm bells blared in my mind, warning me to keep my distance from her. While she was distracted I let myself take in how the skinny jeans she wore left little to the imagination and the blue top complemented the exact same shade of her eyes.

But I knew she looked better without anything on. Images of her scantily clad in only her underwear when she had slept in my bed had been burned into my mind. I remembered how soft her porcelain skin looked and the slight point of her mouth that made me want to cover her lips with mine.

Stop it! I told myself. The quickening in my veins was a reminder of how attracted I was to her.

Why don't you screw her and get it over with? Could it be that simple? If it was, why was I still standing here debating whether it was a good idea or not?

The struggle inside me was making it impossible to make a clear decision when it came to her. I knew she was innocent but I kept telling myself she couldn't be that innocent. There were few girls who made it to college with their virginity intact.

Despite my attempts to keep my distance, I found myself making my way to her. Jordan was still glued to her side and there was no way I would approach her with her there. So I hung back, keeping my options for the night open with a few girls who had made it clear with bold looks in my direction that I was guaranteed a bed partner for the night.

But none of them kept my attention like Taylor did. As hard as I tried to resist, my eyes felt a magnetic pull to her.

Her big expressive eyes scanned the crowd. Jordan wasn't with her anymore. Before I knew what I was doing I was headed in her direction. I crept up behind her. The gentle sway of her hips to the music made me look at her appreciatively despite all the reasons to keep away from her.

I put my hands on her hips and slid them around her small waist. She smelled like an array of flowers on a spring day. My lips neared her ear.

"I didn't expect to see you here," I whispered huskily.

She leaned her body into mine and I had to fight the urge to spin her around. And do all the things I had been dreaming about, starting with a kiss that would take her breath away.

But my conscience made me release her slowly and turn her to face me. She lifted her eyes to meet mine. There was no doubt about the effect she had on me. It was like taking a step out of a plane without a parachute strapped to my back and free-falling.

The need to still touch her made me keep my hands loosely on her hips. I smiled at her, trying to mask the inner struggle between what I knew was the right thing to do and what I wanted to do. In response to my smile her eyes fluttered slightly, proving she was as affected by me as I was by her.

"I hope you haven't taken any drinks from strangers tonight," I told her, allowing my eyes to drop momentarily to her soft pink lips that I wanted to kiss.

She bit down on her lip, pulling her lip between her teeth. It wasn't helping me trying to do the right thing instead of embracing my attraction to her and throwing caution to the wind. She shook her head. Thank goodness she had learned an important lesson. The sight of Jordan returning caught my eyes and I knew it was time to make myself scarce.

"I'd better go before your friend gets back." I leaned forward, my breath fanning her cheek.

"I'll see you around, Taylor," I whispered before I left her standing in the same spot as I disappeared in among the crowd at the party.

On the outside I kept my composure but on the inside I was shaken. The brief encounter with Taylor still had my heart racing and I could still feel the softness of her skin beneath my hands.

Now there were more reasons to stay away from her. She was far too innocent for me to taint and I knew no matter how brief any encounter with her would be it would leave a lasting impression. We hadn't even slept together yet and she was constantly creeping into my thoughts uninvited. How bad would it be if I tasted her lips and felt her naked skin against mine?

With that, I made up my mind. I was still trying to make a life for myself and there was no room in it for a girl who I could feel more for than I was prepared to.

I got another drink and focused on finding someone else to help me forget about Taylor.

There wasn't a shortage so it didn't take long before I had a girl's undivided attention. I made myself kiss her like I wanted no one else, but I was fooling myself.