{This one is a personal favorite. It's the reason why I texted my cousin when I got Prince Achmed on Disney Crossy Road this summer... it's great!}
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SOLDIERS (alternating): in your homeland you're a legend/all the people know your name!/On the battlefield and off, you are superior.
ACHMED: I know. In the kingdom, though, I'm finding that my only claim to fame is an incident involving my posterior...
SOLDIERS: posterior...
ACHMED: please. I've won scores of bloody wars, and mopped the floors with my foes. But no one remembers Achmed. I've eviscerated peasants from their heads down to their toes. But no one remembers Achmed. Say my name in these parts and you'll get a vacant stare- until you mention tigers or spotted underwear.
SOLDIERS: spotted underwear!
ACHMED: so to restore my repute as a fierce, fearsome brute, there's only one route I see: arrange the slaughter of millions of innocent civilians, then they'll remember me.
{Dialogue}
SOLDIERS: caked in mud or drenched in blood, you smell as fresh as a flower...
ACHMED: yes.
SOLDIERS: but no one remembers Achmed. You can pleasure sixty concubines in only an hour...
ACHMED: less!
SOLDIERS: but no one remembers Achmed!
ACHMED: back home, I was a hero; ladies trembled when I spoke. But here, the women treat me like a throwaway joke...
SOLDIERS: throw him away...
ACHMED: I'm a god on Earth, but darnit, even deities incarnate now and then can feel a little insecure.
SOLDIERS: insecure.
ACHMED: all I want is some affection. This rejection's almost too much too endure.
SOLDIERS: to endure. Look at all he must endure!
{Dialogue}
SOLDIERS: you ooze sex when you flex those impeccable pecs.
ACHMED: but the princess rejects me still! She may not love me yet, but I'm willing to bet that once I kill all her people, she will.
SOLDIERS: yes she will, yes she absolutely will!
ACHMED: let them laugh, that's just fine. But the last laugh will be mine-
ALL: 'cause they can't laugh when they're all dead! I'll make them all regret the day they chose to forget-
ACHMED: what's the name, everyone?
SOLDIERS: tiger fucker!
ACHMED: no! Like I said, what's that name?
SOLDIERS: you're the cock of the walk, with abs as hard as a rock- nevermore will they mock you, Achmed!
SOLDIER: he fucked a tiger...
ACHMED: I did not fuck a tiger!
SOLDIERS: they'll remember Achmed. They'll remember Achmed. They'll remember Achmed...
ACHMED: they'll remember me!
SOLDIERS: tiger fucker, tiger fucker- Achmed is a tiger fucker! They'll remember Achmed, the tiger fucking man!
CZYTASZ
Team StarKid: the Lyrics
FanfictionTeam StarKid. I have been a fan for less than a year already. So... here's my book of the lyrics to all of the songs from A Very Potter Musical, A Very Potter Sequel, Starship, Holy Musical B@man, A Very Potter Senior Year, Twisted, The Trail to Ore...
