A Summer In Arizona || A Lady Gaga Fanfiction

Chapter 31 - She Just Wants To Sleep

'Oh my God!' Tara exclaimed, while she hugged me tightly. 'I'm so glad to see you. I've been so worried about you. The Haus of Gaga too. I'm pretty sure Christian would've hanged himself if you stayed away any longer. You look really different, by the way.'

I nodded, slightly overwhelmed by Tara's energy. 'Probably the hair.'

'No, it's in your face,' she said. 'You have this glow. I can't define it. And you're so tan. How did you do that?'

A glow? More like sweating like a horse because my whole body was being thrown upside down. I could literally feel the blood rushing to my uterus. 'Yeah, the heat of Arizona changes you.'

Tara smiled. 'You need to tell me everything, but I think we need to sit down first, because there are a million things I need to go over with you. Everything is one big chaos at the moment. I'm literally on the verge of a mental breakdown. I really couldn't have prolonged it any longer.'

I looked at her. Her dark roots told me she had a lot on her plate, because it sporadically occurred she didn't have time to dye her hair. 

The following days were crazy busy and hectic. I left early in the morning to meet up with the Hause of Gaga and returned late at night. I had so many meetings that I sometimes didn't even know which one I was in and when I came home, I went straight to bed and nodded off into something that was more like a coma than a peaceful sleep. 

I had so many things to organize. The press was on my back, because there still was no statement for my disappearance and the internet was exploding of all the rumors people had spread. Some claimed I'd been kidnapped, others were sure I had ended my musical career. Those rumors didn't really do my image any justice and we needed to change that as fast as possible.

A few days after I'd came back, they had already arranged a photo shoot with me for Harper's Bazaar and I really didn't feel like posing in front of a camera. The shoot took the entire day and I was happy Tara was with me, because I wouldn't have survived without her. That morning it took me a lot of effort to get out of bed. I'd slept for over ten hours, but when I woke up in the morning it felt like I hadn't even slept at all. When we left for the shoot, I fell asleep in the car and it took Tara five minutes to wake me up. I was still sleepy when they dragged me into make-up and the makeup artists tried to cover my under eye bags and pale skin, but that was hardly possible.

First it wasn't too bad. I really tried my best and pretended I wasn't feeling as bad as I did. I really felt uncomfortable in front of the camera with all those people around me and the little black outfit I was wearing, pressed on my stomach which only made me more nauseous than I already was. Normally I didn't have any problems with shoots, indeed, I loved being in front of the camera, but that day I really wanted to just go home and sleep.

'Try to relax,' the photographer said to me. 

I nodded, but had no idea how I could relax while I in fact was constantly holding back my tears and the need to throw up. I tried to pose like I normally would, but the people and heavy flashes made me so nervous. 

'Guys, she needs more powder. She's starting to shimmer again,' the photographer commanded. Five people immediately came out from the side and started to powder my face and pull on my wig. I nearly choked on the hairspray and that was when I'd had enough.

'Stop!' I screamed. They stepped away from me like I was a toddler throwing a tantrum. 'I'm sorry. I really need a break from all this.' And I walked away from them on my high heels. I went outside and the fresh air did me good. I was sweaty and my hands were trembling. I felt like I was going to black out, but then the door swept open and Tara appeared. She rushed to me.