Artificial Water

Chapter 9🥀

Jongin

The truth was that I hadn't told Hayoon about me picking up Soo. I didn't lie to him though cause not telling her was also a way. Since our mother would come to the shop tomorrow I said I had to arrange some things and she believed me, which was a miracle. I couldn't remember the last time she gave up that quickly. She had asked where Soo was though and I told her the truth about that part. Then she made a stupid comment on how I was gonna miss my little boy and I almost slapped her. She always had to make things sound horrible. Just as she did with the age difference between Soo and I. She acted like I was an old man and he was a young student while I was only two years older.

I was pulled out of my thoughts when the passenger's door was being opened and Soo got in the car. He flashed me a small smile, but it soon faded.

"Hey," I greeted him. "How was your day?"

"Don't act like you care about it," he mumbled and placed his bag on the floor between his feet, he then looked up at me and saw my hurt expression. "I'm sorry," he apologised quickly. "My day wasn't great, thanks for asking."

"I'm sorry?" It sounded more like a question because I wasn't sorry about anything but it sounded like the right thing to say. 

"Thanks for coming," he whispered and looked down at his hands that were folded on his lap.

"I promised," I reminded him and briefly placed my hand on his knee, hoping it would comfort him. "What do you want to eat tonight?" I asked, trying to make this conversation less heavy but all it did was making me realise in what a ridiculous situation I was. What was I doing? 

"Jajangmyeon," Soo answered without a doubt. "Please," he added. 

"Sure, we'll just have to drop by the store." I started the engine and drove off. 

Soo nodded and pressed the side of his head against the window with his eyes closed. I wondered if his mother would be looking for him, school would have let him go like that. Probably not, that would be weird and stupid. No, his mother couldn't have asked help for her missing son. But why wouldn't she? If I had a kid I would be miserable by now. This was a bad sign and I should find out more, but I would rest it for now. Just today.

I glanced at him and noticed a red line on his wrist. "Soo, I called to get his attention. He turned his head to look at me and I pointed at his hand. "What did you do?"

Soo examined the redness and shrugged, "I don't know, maybe I hurt myself without knowing." 

I nodded but didn't buy the excuse. It sounded odd to me. You could bump into things and get a bruise or a scratch without noticing, but not around your wrist. First things first though. I was too tired to figure it all out today. I would start tomorrow, I told myself. Yes, I will do that.

~ 

Soo's face lit up the minute I asked if he wanted to help me make dinner. I have never seen someone being so into cooking as he was. I ended up leaning against the counter while watching him intently. His dark hair hung almost in his eyes and he lifted his hand to brush it away. The movement itself was nothing special but it sucked up all my attention at once. The locks fell back down though and without realising what I was doing, I reached out and wiped them to one side. Soo looked up from the sudden touch and uncertainty was visible in his big eyes. I knew I had made a mistake but wasn't aware of the consequences yet. He coughed a little, making clear I had stared too long and I immediately looked at the food on the counter. I didn't want him to feel uncomfortable so I started talking, "how's it going?" 

"Want to try the sauce?" He asked and lowered his spoon in the liquid while waiting for my reply. 

"Sure." I let him guide the spoon to my mouth and carefully tasted it. "That's really good," I spoke afterwards. 

Soo smiled happily and just like that the tensed moment was gone. It made me not just wonder in what kind of situation I was, but also what I personally wanted. When I first met him I wanted to make sure he was safe and then it got a little more complicated and I rather butted out, but that was no option. Right now, I just wanted him to be happy, cause I couldn't find a reason why he didn't deserve that. It made me confused about my own feelings. "Why do you want to stay here?" The question was out of my mouth before I could stop myself.

Soo stopped with what he was doing and frowned, "what do you mean?"

"Can't you stay with someone else?" I asked. "Isn't there a family member?" 

He turned his back to me and kept silent. I swallowed thickly, knowing I ruined a happy moment. Why couldn't I keep my mouth shut? "Soo..." I moved closer but didn't dare to touch him. "I didn't mean it like that." 

He didn't reply again so I wrapped my fingers around his wrist to make him face me again, but he winced and pulled away. "Please... Just stay away." 

"I am so sorry." I took his hand, ignoring his earlier words, and rubbed the red skin tenderly. "I forgot about it." 

Soo bit his lip and stared down at our hands. "I went to school like you told me to, had a bad day and was actually happy to see you." He paused for a moment and looked up at me. "I really tried but if you want me to leave, just say it to my face. I know I am a burden that breaks your stuff. You are just scared that something will happen to me and that your coincidence won't leave you alone, but tell me honestly, what do you want me to do?" 

I thought about what he had said but couldn't find a good answer. "I don't know."

He pulled his hand back and I immediately felt like a jerk. "Soo, listen. Do you think staying with me will solve all your problems?" 

He started fumbling with the hem of his sweater and nodded, "most of them, yes." 

I was taken aback by his answer. Was he serious? "How?" I asked surprised.

"Can we please just go back to cooking?" He asked and turned around to face the stove. "I don't want to talk about it."

"Okay then." I scratched the back of my neck absently while thinking of how I could solve his problems. I thought I was just a place he ran away to, but he seemed honest and knowing this made it even more difficult than it already was.