Speaking

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i speak to a boy,
older than me.
he flirts shamelessly.
i do not flirt back.
his friends tell me
he wants me. 
he demonstrated
what he would do to me
on a pillow.
they say,
"do you want to see what he did? you'll like it."  
i almost vomit,
my face as red as apples in the fall.
they laugh at me.

i am suffocating.

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