Journey

[18] Is that a deal?

Sorry for the long ass chapter! (2481 words)
Please read the A/N at the end❤

Life is mostly painful but we live for the small happiness. It's really small but in the world of darkness, that little happiness seems like the brightest hope. And whatever bright light we get, seems very precious for us to let go. So we don't quit easily thinking there is still something to hold on. It's all just a lie.

Life, pain, happiness all are lies. We come in earth, do works and then die. Everything else is a lie. And these feelings in between, makes everything seem harder than they really are.

I look straight through the car window in silence as Kayden drives through the lonely road, to my aunt's house. We didn't talk for a long while. As soon as I got the news of his cancer, I feel nothing but dead. It's funny how my life became good from bad because of him, and again going to be bad because of him. It's like he is my happiness. As long as he's with me, I'm alright. The moment he leaves, my smile leaves with him. And I feel empty.

"Are you okay?" He asks.

I remain silent not wanting to face the truth. Tears appeared in my eyes and I couldn't breathe.

"Andrea?"

I tried to breathe heavily struggling to stop my tears from falling. My chest aching from the pain.

"You're making me worried. Say something!" his voice filled with pain and concern and I can't hold it in anymore.

"Stop the car" I say sternly.

Soon after he parks the car by the side of the road in front of a large field. I quickly got out of the car without looking back at him and gasped painfully for air. How can emptiness feel so heavy?

I feel a pair of hands on my shoulder and move away from him. My eyes glossy by the tears. All I'm seeing is blurry vision but still I can figure out the hurt in his eyes.

"Andrea what happe-" he tries to speak but I cut him off.

"Why do you care?" I rub my tears and see him standing in shock.

"What do you mean by why do I care? I-"

"You've been lying to me all this while" I shout.

"Wha-"

"Shut up! Charolette told me everything!" I feel the tears again brimming from my eyes. "That you have blood cancer!" I scream and fall on my knees crying. I just breathed again and again, and each breathe was more painful than the last one.

I cry covering my face with my hands and he just stands there without moving a bit. I feel him holding my hands and pulling them away slowly. I look at his face, and that was a big mistake. His eyes were blood red. He was crying but tried his best to hide it. That broke me more and I couldn't help but hug him tight, burying my face in his chest.

Silence. All we could hear was the sound of cars passing, the wind and my sobs. He didn't let a single sob leave his mouth in case he wouldn't be able to stop. Why do the good people has to have so much pain? He doesn't deserve that.

After few minutes of me crying, holding him, I break the silence.

"Why didn't you tell me?" I whisper.

"I thought it won't matter" he says in a weak voice. I could feel his hand leaving my back, reaching his face and rubbing his tears.

I pull away.

"How would it not Kayden? You mean so much to me" I furrow my eyebrows. "You're the reason I was able to leave the hell hole and now.." I sob. "And now you're gonna leave me" a tear rolls down my cheek.