daddy • Lil Xan

33

Diegos POV

I woke up around 4am to use the bathroom. I remember falling asleep with Madeline in my arms, but when I woke up, she wasn't there. I figured she was just getting something to eat or using the restroom. after using the bathroom I went to the kitchen to look for Madeline. she wasn't there either. "Madeline!" I called through out the house. 

I couldn't find her. 

I decided to check the security cameras.  i had two out front and three out back. 

the footage showed she wasn't anywhere outside in view of the cameras.  my heart started racing. I was getting nervous.  I went back to the room and looked to see if her phone was in there. 

it wasn't. 

I decided to call her phone, hoping shed pick up. 

I called and it rang, and rang.

no answer. 

I run outside and down the porch. 

" MADELINE!!!!" my heart was pounding. I was only so worried because the girl just got out of a fucking institution. 

and then I saw her. sitting in the road. sh was wrapped up in a blanket, and had one of the sweatshirts I gave her. 

I run over to her and grab her by her shoulder. 

" WHAT THE FUCK MADELINE WHAT IS YOUR PROBLEM!!!" I yell. she stands up and I shove her and she falls back down. I immediately regret it. 

" i...i..need...I needed air.." she mumbles. she isn't even looking at me. 

" FUCKING LOOK AT ME MADELINE!!! I WAS SO FUCKING WORRIED!!! WHY DO YOU NEED AIR AT 4 IN THE DAMN MORNING !!!" my voice just keeps getting louder and louder. 

" BECAUSE I HAD A NIGHTMARE AND I FELT LIKE I WAS SUFFOCATING. I. NEEDED. AIR!!"  she yells back. 

" THEN WHY DIDNT YOU FUCKING ANSWER ME WHEN I WAS CALLING YOUR NAME THE FIRST TIME! YOU COULDVE FUCKING WOKE ME UP OR SOMETHING" I yell. I'm pretty sure the neighbors were outside watching. we were yelling loud enough for the whole neighborhood to hear. 

" WHY ARE YOU YELLING AT ME!!!!!I TRIED WAKING YOU UP" she stands back up and shoves me a good foot or two away. 

" BECAUSE I WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE A NORMAL FUCKING GIRLFRIEND, ONE THATS NOT SO FUCKED UP IN THE HEAD RIGHT NOW , ONE WHO WASNT SELFISH ENOUGH TO TRY AND KILL HERSELF!!" I yell harshly in her face. I immediately regretted that too. I regretted it so much I automatically started to tear up, and tears fell down my cheek. 

" I tried to kill myself because of you. think of how selfish YOU had to be to make me feel WORTHLESS ENOUGH TO DO SUCH A THING!!!" she yells, her voice cracking as she starts to sob.

just hearing the cracking in her voice and seeing her sob, broke my heart. no, it was as If I just took a hammer to my own heart shattering it to tiny pieces as I heard every loud shard of glass fall down onto the concrete roading under neath my feet.

she looks at me in disgust and walks away towards the house.

"madeline...wa.." she throws her hand up and flips me off. she walks inside the house and slams the door. 

I dry my eyes up outside and I wait a few minutes to go inside. 

when I walk inside, I see Madeline curled up on the couch with a pillow and blanket. asleep.

I wanted to curl up next to her. but I knew I made such a huge mistake by saying what I said. I went back to my room and laid in the big, now empty bed. it felt  so cold and lonely without Madeline here. i finally fell back asleep around 6am.  it took me about 2 hours worth of tears to finally make me fall asleep.  

I woke up around 2pm.  and when I woke up, Madeline wasn't home.

 I tried calling her phone but of course she didn't answer. 

I sat on the couch and waited for her. I waited exactly 3 hours and 12 minutes. 

she walked through the door at 5:12pm. I jumped up from the couch. 

" where the fuck were you !!!!" I say getting defensive. 

" getting my fucked up, selfish problems taken care of. atleast thats what YOU call them, right?" she says sarcastically as she walks into the kitchen.

" whats that supposed to mean??" I  say following her into the kitchen. 

she shakes her head at me in disgust. 

" you know what, how about you go hit up Jessica until I get my problems fixed Diego. you were probably gonna do it anyway!! shit! she might've been here while I was at therapy !!"  

"therapy..?" 

" matter of fact, let me call her for you!" she pulls her phone out of her back pocket and starts dialing a number. I take her phone out of her hand and throw it against the wall. leaving a hole in the kitchen wall. 

" IS THAT WHAT YOU WANT!!?? ME TO CHEAT ON YOU WITH JESSICA ? ARE YOU JUST WAITING FOR ME TO SCREW UP SO YOU CAN JUST LEAVE ???" I yell getting very defensive.

she jut looks at me with hate in her eyes. 

" WHAT IS YOUR PROBLEM MADELINE!" 

she walks close to me and grits her teeth. 

"my problem is, that last night, what you said, I would've never expect YOU to say that kind of shit.  maybe from someone else, but not you. your definetly not who I thought you were. " she puts on her jacket and grabs her busted up phone and walks out the door. 

how the fuck am I supposed to fix this? I'm so in love with her. I can't lose her...

lol this chapter took longer than it was supposed to. BUT COMMENT DOWN BELOW WHAT YOU GUYS THINKKKKK OFFFFF TTTHHIIIISSSS OOONNNNEEEEE