mon amour (sequel to bonjour) •joshler•

quatre

tyler sighed walking through the front door of his apartment while dropping his keys on a nearby counter, a muscle memorable action. it was a hard day. his focus on university and jobs has had him confused and dazed for the past couple of months it's hard for him to even think straight. the poor boy wasn't getting sleep, nor did he feel like putting effort into certain things anymore. getting older sucked.

it'll pass, he thought.

"hard day?" billie. that's who tyler needs right now, a friend.

the brunette nodded, rubbing his eye before going for a lazy hug. if there was one thing he knew for sure about billie, it was that her hugs were like pure heaven. sighing into her shoulder he realized how many weeks it's been since he really talked about stuff. like, mental stuff. surely billie would be open, right?

"are you free tonight?" the boy hummed, his arms still wrapped in billies frame.

"of course" she let go, putting her hands on either sides of tylers cheek, "are you okay?"

"i'll take that as a - yes?"

tyler raised his head to connect his lips with josh, smiling as he kissed back. the two boys laughed, different thoughts cascading through their minds.

"never been better"

tyler shook the thought out of his brain, blinking away the past. his mouth forced a small smile, yet his eyes screamed sadness.

"i've been better"

he watched as billie sighed, and then immediately tried to make him feel better. throughout the next twenty minutes billie had gathered all of the sweets in their kitchen and put on good-feeling movies. the kind that would make you smile and you didn't even realize it.

tyler was grateful to say the least. it was a small occurrence that someone would successfully put a smile on his face. after the first film finished the two stayed quiet, bored but happy. the boy opened his mouth hesitantly, wanting to speak yet changing what he would say at last minute.

"i think i should start seeing people"

billie raised her eyebrows, "really? already?" she asked, seeing an emotionless face in return.

"why not? it's not like i have anything to lose"

"what about that american kid? what was his name? john?"

joshua. it's joshua

"something like that" he mumbled, "it'll get my mind off of him anyways. it's not like he'll ever come back so there's no use in crying over him, you know?"

"you never know" she smiled.

tyler smiled back, yet his lips faltered as his brain made a conclusion, "he probably forgot about me anyways"

"forgot? who could forget you? and in the matter of a year?"

"he had this - thing, he forgot a bunch of stuff. it was weird" his voice trailed off, the subject of him made tyler want to puke of sadness.

"well did he ever forget you?"

tyler opened his mouth to answer yet closed it, wanting to change the topic and change it fast, "what about you? anyone?"

"well i mean-"

she immediately stopped as a text tone was heard from tylers phone. the boy looked down expecting a normal boring lettered text from his boss or classmate, yet widened his eyes as he picked up the screen.

joshuah: hey b were u serious abt the whole trip thing

joshuah: bc i honestly don't know if i'm emotionally ready to see him again

"who is it?"

a lump was held in tylers throat, "it's - um it's"

her mouth was agape as she took his phone out of his numb hand, "did he just text you?"

joshuah: oh shit

joshuah: oh fuck i'm sosorry wrong number

•*•*•*•*•*•
*•*•*•*•*•*

"ohmyGOD"

josh slammed his phone down on the counter, his veins overflowing with instant regret. he backed against a wall and slid downwards until his knees were close to his chest. he covered his head in his hands, his mouth muffled.

"ohmygodohmygodohmygodohmyGOD-"

"what the fuck happened to you?" jordan walked in the room, laughing at the way his brother was acting.

"hey man can you google something for me?" josh said, his voice aching from the dryness in his throat.

"what?"

"can you google 'how to kill yourself in under ten seconds and you don't have a gun with you' really quick?"

jordan raised his eyebrows, noticing his brothers phone lighting up. with him being the curious type, he read the text that blinked on his screen.

lé tyler: it's fine

"tyler?"

"oh god please don't say his name right now" josh mumbled in his hands.

"ok well tyler said 'it's fine' whatever that means"

josh groaned, his entire self worth being thrown down the drain. he's never felt so awful in years, this was definitely his lowest point.

"alright - well feel better" jordon promptly left the room, never really being that good at talking with people.

silence was held throughout the room as josh sat still against the wall, leaving his phone untouched. yet another text tone sounded through his phone, causing him to flinch. he texted again. reluctantly, the boy stood up and grabbed his phone. his heart dropped, now realizing that he was completely fucked.

lé tyler: what trip?