mon amour (sequel to bonjour) •joshler•

six

i had a dream about u yesterday

tylor: aw really

ya it was about u changing ur USERNAME i liked the other one change it back

tylor: joshua it is two in the morning

so

tylor: i am starting to think you did not have a dream about me

i did!

well kinda

it's a long story

tylor: you just needed an excuse to talk to me

...maybe

incoming call from: tylor

josh's heart sank from sudden nervousness. he wanted so badly to hear his voice. but he also wanted so badly to get better, to leave him behind.

ah what the hell.

accept

the call was silent at first, neither one wanted to talk. they both felt the same way, overwhelmed with nerves that it was too difficult to mutter a simple greeting. it's been so long since josh had heard tylers voice,

please talk first

"is the call working? the reception here can be not good"

josh beamed. for once since tyler left his  heart jumped from sheer excitement, his eardrums sang, his lungs choked up a laugh that he actually meant.

"you sound sweeter than i remember" he whispered to himself, knowing full well that the blushing boy on the other end heard him.

"you are dumb joshua"

joshua.

the boy was so overwhelmed with joy his back dropped onto his pillow, his cheeks feeling sore from smiling too much.

"you know i haven't let anyone else say my name like you do"

"what do you mean?"

"you say my full name, and you say it like - like it's the newest word you've ever heard. you totally mispronounce it and that's what makes it better. no one else says it like you do. and i don't want anyone else saying it but you."

"it's not my fault i don't know american names"

josh laughed, hearing a lonely car pass from outside. listening to the silence between them he sighed, "i do miss you, you know"

a beat of silence was heard until tyler questioned, "you do?"

"of course" he smiled as he looked up at the ceiling, plastic glow up stars stuck on the wall above him, "i miss how you thought cotton candy was a cloud"

josh's heart swooned over the small laugh that escaped tylers mouth. josh didn't know it, but tyler was sat alone looking out at the stars while a small tear trickled down his pretty cheek, unable to comprehend how he got himself into this mess.

"i miss you too" he mumbled, "i miss how protective you were over me, and how i beat you at video games, and how i felt - felt -"

"free?"

"yeah, and just - better - in every way."

"me too"

josh didn't want to, but he heard a sniff on the other end of the call. he decided to dismiss it, maybe he was just sick or something.

"what was that dream about?"

"dream?" josh thought. oh

that dream.

"oh i just - had a dream where you were in it -you know?"

"i know that already, tyler laughed, what was happening?"

"i was at brendon's house - remember brendon?"

"of course"

"well i was there and so was matty , he gave me this thing because apparently i had a headache - anyways. it's still kinda blurry but you were just suddenly there, you walked through the front door i think."

"what did matty give you?"

now that josh had thought of it, he never said what it was. he said it was for his headache, right? was he even asleep? when did he wake up?

"joshua?"

"yeah? sorry"

"we don't have to talk about it if you don't want to."

"oh - um" josh paused, "thanks"

"tyler? qui est-ce?"

josh suddenly felt a pang of hurt, who was he with? did he meet someone else? is that a girl?
he should've known. he should've fucking known.

"who's th-"

"merde!" tyler whisper yelled, "i am sorry joshua i must go, i - um - iloveyoubye"

end of call.

josh's face went still, a slight grin fading into his lips. he waited, listening to the lonely dial tone playing in his right ear. the boy opened his mouth, trying to breathe, he never thought it was possible to not be able to breathe from how ecstatically happy he was.

"i love you - too" he whispered, and for some reason he thought that maybe things were going to be okay after all.