Safe Place | j.h

17: Late Nights

"You're what?" Jace asked, hands on his knees and head hung between them.

Clary wanted to beg him not to make her say it again. "I'm breaking up with you." She knew how much it hurt him when Emery left, and now she was doing the same thing. Leaving him. Clary felt terrible about it. All of the anger she had felt for Emery for leaving, and breaking Jace, Izzy and Alec, was gone.

Jace didn't say anything after Clary repeated herself. He stared at the ground. Jace felt hurt, again. Why was every girl in his life leaving? Was it him?

"Look Jace I'm sorry but you-"

Jace mumbled something underneath his breath, making Clary stop. She wasn't even sure what she was supposed to say. Nothing could make this alright. His hands were shaking so bad he had clasped them together tightly. Jace's knuckles turned red and his breath corse.

Clary swallowed a lump in her throat, "Jace please don't be mad-"

"No I'm gunna be mad." Jace said, standing up. "You're leaving also I get to be mad." He started walking to the door, but Clary stood between him and the exit. "Clary move." His voice was dark, dangerous.

"Jace please." She begged, her voice broken and her eyes glossy.

Jace scuffed. "You shouldn't be upset Clary." She wasn't sure what to say to him. Jace was right, she shouldn't be upset. She was breaking up with him. It wasn't fair that she was crying.

Clary then moved, letting Jace pass her. They had been having a good night. They were laying in bed, talking, kissing, all of the above. For once they were happy. Clary wasn't jealous or nagging him about Emery or other girls. Jace was groaning about Simon. For once they weren't yelling at each other, and she ruined it.

Jace went to his room. Immediately the door was closed behind him with a loud thud. He looked frantically around his room before he began throwing things across the room. Jace took a vase that had been sitting on his tv stand and chucked it against the wall. His voice horse, and tears rushed down his face. He was crying, and his eyes were red.

Jace felt like he wasn't good enough. A consequence of how he had been raised prior to living with the Lightwoods. And now with Clary, his rock and his love, leaving the feeling resurfaced. His chest was tight, making it hard for Jace to breath.

Emery ran from her room when she heard the sound of shattering glass. She had been reading a book in her bed, but the loud crash drew her attention away. When she made it to the hall, there was another crash and a yell.

It came from Jace's room.

She threw the door open, to see Jace sitting with his back to his bed, elbows resting on his knees and head hung between his knees. Emery licked her lips, behind her came Alec. His breath heavy, as if he had come from the gym.

"I've got it Alec." Alec nodded carefully, still not sure of leaving Jace. "Really Alec I've got him." Alec began walking back down the hall, only to stop at his own room. He figured he would wait there, just in case.

Emery shut the door behind her, Jace didn't look up. She wasn't sure what she was supposed to do, comforting people wasn't her strong suit. She carefully sat down next to Jace, he still didn't look up to her. He only cried harder when she placed her head on his shoulder and laced her fingers with his.

"Jace if you don't want to talk that's fine I'll stay but," She paused for a second, and considered her words, "if you don't want to talk just let me know if I need to leave." Emery finished, making it clear that she would stay, if he wanted her too.

Jace didn't answer her, he just gripped her hand harder in his. Emery took that as a sign to stay, to stay and keep him company.

He don't trust himself alone. Jace had lots of self destructive tendencies, he was afraid of what he would do if she left him alone. Perhaps he would destroy everything he owned, he as dramatic like that. Maybe he would burn something. Maybe he would burn himself, in order to feel something. Anything. So no, he didn't want her to leave.

Emery sat with Jace for hours, he didn't cry the whole time. Only for a few hours before he stopped. Soon he laid his head across Emery's lap, where she pulled her fingers threw his golden hair. Soon Jace fell fast asleep on the floor, Emery didn't fall asleep. She couldn't fall asleep, she was afraid that if she did then when she woke he would be gone.

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A/N
Word Count: 818