Fishy's Adventures

Chapter Seven - Radhaven

-But why are we going to the sea? We wanted to go to the mountains! - Fishy's wife said, while they were sitting in Fishy's weedmobile.

-It's because water, my dear, is the most important element of the four. Without it, you ain't going to ever make any weed. - Fishy replied.

His vehicle had numerous conveniently placed blunt holders, which made his life that much easier while driving. Fishy simply couldn't focus on the road without his weed. Good thing he had more of it in his trunk that he'd ever need this month.
After several hours of a thoroughly pleasant ride (at least for Fishy) our hero and his family got out, having arrived in the humble coastal city of Radhaven.

-Alright, it's getting late, so let's look for some kind of a hote... ..err, I mean youth hostel.

His family didn't question his plans at all. They knew better than to interrupt his intentions.
The next day, they went to a restaurant, situated right next to a local Radhavenian beach.

-What would you like to order? Our specialty is salmon, sir. We also serve trout, catfish and herring, all with french fries!

The waiter quickly changed the subject, seeing the way Fishy was looking at him. Like a leopard at a zebra. Jokes about last names should definitely be below this restaurant's standards.

-We also recommend.. ..uhh.. french fries without a single bit of fish, but with addition of ketchup and garlic sauce.

Fishy stood up and asked the waiter as politely as he could:

-I need some food for the soul, slave. Where are the local weed dealers?

-Let me just take the orders from the rest of your family, sir. Then I will personally show you to the local 'coffee shop'. - The waiter was trying to save the situation.

-Sure hon, we will have 3 plates of chips with all the fancy sauces they've got. Then we'll go to the beach and sunbathe a bit. - Ms Fishy said, for the first time in this story.

-Just don't lie too much on the sun, 'cause that way you'll get more baked than I'm going to! - Fishy said and winked, seemingly relieved by the prospect of sampling the local weed, forgetting the waiter's offence in an instant.

Afterwards, the waiter took Fishy to a villa not as far away as our hero had expected. He left him, a bit frightened. Our hero entered the building only to be greeted by guns pointed at him.

-Hey there, Fishy! Thought you'd never visit me here, what a surprise. - Fishy recognized the dealer that tried to poison him the previous episode. - What are you even doing here, by the sea? Visiting your relatives? Hahaha!

Fishy's soul was being filled with hatred to this dealer. Not only did he catch him off-guard, but also made silly referenced to his last name. Fishy has had enough, however seing his situation he decided to buy himself some time, seeing he was outnumbered sevenfold at that point.

-Why did you even try to poison me? I was your best customer, after all!

-Because then I would have become the new weed tycoon of the area! All your privileges would be mine, if only the stupid Brit, my old co-worker, didn't mess up everything! But now, there's nobody to save you. Nobody will cry after your death.
You will sleep with the fish, Fishy.

-Do you really think I will let you kill me so easily? - said Fishy before unexpectedly disarming two of the dealer's thugs in a blink of an eye. The other mobsters have long since lowered their weapons, because it sure hurts an untrained hand in the long term. Surprisingly accurate for a person his age, Fishy shot them and the remaining four bodyguards, leaving the dealer as the only alive person.

-I have a special surprise for you, douchebag. You will see the true meaning of 'go fishing'.

He then tied him up and entangled him tightly in duct tape, immobilizing his every muscle. Then he taped his mouth, so that he was incapable of making any sounds anymore. Fishy put his victim into a trash bag, and tied it carefully. Having accessed and plundered the local stash of cannabis, he took the 'package' and went to the beach. Much to his disappointment, his family was still there and nobody got eaten by sharks. He called his children and told them:

-Kids, here's some rubbish. Why don't you throw it off a cliff and watch it tumble down? It's gonna be balls-out fun!

Fishy's children agreed that it would be indeed entertaining. Not knowing what's inside the bag, they somehow lifted it and threw it off the cliff. They were wondering what kind of rubbish could possibly make such cracking noises when falling and crashing into the cliff wall, before drowning in the water and leaving behind a red trail.
Fishy then spent a pleasant week, smoking blunts and sending his family to the beach every day. At the end of the stay, he felt really energized and ready for further adventures. He returned to Cufthill with his family and got ready for the school year opening. The class hadn't been bullied for a whole month after all. He opened a notebook and started to make notes of the best ideas, which he would soon employ at school..