Little Miss Different: Short Story Collection [#Wattys2018]

1: Pen and Paper

Content note: contains depictions of ableism

Around five years ago

Ellie watches Rebecca leave the classroom. She knows that Rebecca gets told off by teachers for fidgeting and for behaving 'weirdly', and Ellie has heard her classmates whisper about her. They say things like, "Here comes the weirdo" or "Look at my stupid dance, my name's Rebecca!" and even though she hides it, Ellie can see how upset it makes Rebecca. So as Rebecca starts dragging her bag out of her locker, Ellie approaches her.

"Hi," says Ellie politely. Best to keep the conversation polite and neutral.

Rebecca looks up from tugging her bag free of the blue locker. "Oh, hello," she replies. "Who are you?"

"I'm Ellie. Do you want help with your bag?" asks Ellie. Rebecca grins sheepishly.

"If you wouldn't mind," she mumbles.

Ellie pulls Rebecca's backpack out of her locker. The zip comes open as she does so, and Ellie sees the mounds of folders inside. "That's a lot of folders. Bet that bag's heavy," she remarks.

"It's not, really," replies Rebecca. "They've mainly just got pieces of paper in. My school books are on a shelf in my locker." She points at a flimsy-looking plastic shelf reinforced with thick bounds of tape. "Some kids snapped it in half a while back," she explains.

"Did you not tell a teacher?" suggests Ellie.

"Yeah, but he said it was my fault for acting weird so the normal kids couldn't be blamed for their behaviour," she mumbles again. 

"Did you tell your parents?" Ellie asks.

Rebecca looks down sadly. "I did, which is when I moved schools." She smiles brightly, a contrast to the close-to-crying expression from before. "I've seen you in English a couple of times," she adds. 

"Oh, you're in my English set?" exclaims Ellie. "Of course! You're the smart girl who sits behind me! You got one hundred percent on your last English test, right?"

Rebecca nods, happy Ellie remembers her. "Yeah. I'm better at English than maths, though," she says. "I'm in a special education class for that."

Ellie frowns. "Well, I think you're only in that class so you can achieve your best," she says brightly. "I've got music now. Where are you going?"

Rebecca locks her locker and checks her timetable. "Dance. Wish I had art. I'm actually good at that," she groans.

"What's wrong with dance?" 

"It's so hard," moans Rebecca. "'Cause I'm hypermobile, sometimes I sprain my ankle, or my ADHD stops me paying attention probably or I get really hyper. It's just the worst lesson, because of how strict the teacher is with me."

Before Ellie can respond positively, Rebecca walks away towards the dance studio. Ellie wishes she hadn't asked what was so bad about dance.

***

Ellie sits down at the bright green desk in her shared bedroom with her foster sibling Aasma. Pulling a shiny lilac notebook out of a drawer, she grabs a bright orange pencil, sharpens it and opens the notebook. Flipping through pages of poems and short stories, Ellie finds a few blank pages right near the end. I'm going to need a new notebook soon. A glance at her shared money pot yields no hope for a new one anytime soon, with just a few five pence pieces and a receipt for a fluffy pink notebook (now hidden away in a drawer that serves as storage for finished notebooks) pushed inside.

Ellie rolls her eyes at her silliness and starts doodling in the margins of her notebook. What would make Rebecca happy?

She realises that she doesn't actually know Rebecca that well. But Ellie's sure Rebecca mentioned liking something or being good at something during their brief conversation.

"Wish I had art.I'm actually good at that."

Art! The simple sentence ignites a colourful spark of creativity and inspiration in Ellie and she begins scribbling graphite words onto the paper as quickly as Ellie-y possible.

***

Ellie cranes away from the pages. Scribbles and squiggles line the pages, making it almost illegible, so she pulls her laptop open and types up the poem in a simple, readable font. After that, she emails it to herself so she can pull it up on her phone tomorrow to show Rebecca.

Just the thought of making Rebecca feel better is reward enough for Ellie.