(After the Mirkwood fashion show)
Fili: Uncle!
Thorin: What is it Fili?
Kili: (pops up from behind Thorin) We would like you to stop participating in Thranduil's fashion shows, please.
Thorin: Kili! (Looks between his nephews) and why would you want me to stop hmmmm?
Kili: (shudders) Well for one, it's traumatizing to see...
Fili: And for two! (shows Thorin the glittery spot in his hair) Innocent people are harmed in the process!! I still haven't gotten this damnable glitter out of my beautiful hair!
Kili: (whispers) don't be such a diva Fili...you sound like Thranduil...
Thranduil: (drops down from the ceiling like spider-man) Did someone say fabulous~?
Kili: No!
Thranduil: (sassy hair flip) Peasants (saunters off)
Thorin: You're both just jealous because I'm too fabulous for you.
Fili: Uncle that's not wh-
Legolas: (pops up behind the dwarves) Did someone say fabulous~?
Fili: Not another one!
Legolas: (sassy hair flip) You may be cute for a dwarf but you're no match for me.
Fili: Wh- what are- DID YOU JUST CALL ME CUTE!?
Thranduil: (shouts from a distance) LEGOLAS WHAT DID I SAY JUST LAST WEEK!? DID I NOT TELL YOU I WILL NOT HAVE MY SON BEING A DWARFSEXUAL!?
Legolas: (shouts back) OH MY GOSH DAD! IT'S MY LIFE!
Thorin, Fili, and Kili: (in unison): Dwarfsexual?
Legolas: (places his hand at his hip) I have to go argue with my father for the next twelve hours, stay fabulous~ (winks at Fili on his way out)
Kili: (shudders)
Fili: (blushes)
Kili: (notices the blushing of his brother) FILI!! YOU ARE NOT TELLING ME YOU'RE AN ELFSEXUAL!?
Fili: Wh-what!? No! Of course not! (whispers) I'm a legolassexual...
Legolas: (jumps down from the ceiling) YAS LET US BE OFF (scoops up Fili and runs away with him in his arms)
Kili: Oh! My! Gosh!! What is with those elves!? WHY are they all on the ceiling!?
Thorin: (in the process of side-stepping away)
Kili: Oh no you don't! (grabs Thorin and pulls him back) My brother may have deserted me but don't think I've changed my stance on your participation in these fashion shows uncle!
Bilbo: (bursts in) OMIGOSH THORIN THERE YOU ARE
Thorin: Bilbo!!
(The two of them run into each other's arms in slow motion and embrace)
Thorin: Why didn't you come to the show bilbo!?
Bilbo: I'm sorry dear!! I got lost! And I forgot my handkerchief so I had to turn back and-
Thorin: You shall have to make it up to me!
Bilbo: I know, I know!
Kili: Oh! I give up! (walks off in a fuss)
Bilbo: Oh thorin, what is that? (points to Thorin's cane.)
Thorin: Oh this is wha- (he holds it up and squeezes it, causing multi-colored glitter to rain down just as Fili was returning with Legolas.)
Fili: NO NOT AGAIN!! (jumps around and tries very aggressively to get the glitter off)
Legolas: Lovely!! (dances around in the raining glitter)
Bilbo: Neat.
Thorin: Yep! It was part of the outfit I modeled but I forgot about it! Else I'd have used it on the crowd!
Fili: (sobbing) why does God hate me
Legolas: (pets Fili's hair) There there, glitter isn't so bad. I think you look rather cute with it.
Fili: (sniffles) Y-you mean it?
Legolas: Yup!
Thranduil: (shouts again from the distance) LEGOLAS YOU BETTER NOT BE FLIRTING WITH THAT DWARF AGAIN
Legolas: (takes fili's hand) C'mon, before he catches us!
Fili: (is being pulled away) See-ya uncle!
Thorin: Bye-bye! (waving to Fili) (mumbles to bilbo) at least one of my nephews has found love, though not the one I expected.
Bilbo: (chuckles) Who knows? Maybe Kili will surprise you Thorin.
(Meanwhile)
Kili: (kicks a rock in frustration) Damn my brother and my uncle and-
Elladan: (drops down from a tree) Hello there!
Kili: AH!
Elladan: AH!
Kili: WHY ARE YOU SCREAMING
Elladan: BECAUSE YOU'RE SCREAMING
Kili: Well you startled me!
Elladan: I'm sorry!
Kili: Who even are you....
Elladan: (places a hand over his heart) I am hurt by you forgetting! I am one of Lord Elrond's sons! Elladan!
Kili: Ohhh, I remember...what do you want?
Elladan: Well I saw you and decided I wanted to ask you to accompany me on a walk around-
Kili: (hair flip) Not interested.
Elladan: Wha-
Kili: Byee (sashays away very much like Thranduil had done during the fashion show)
Elladan: (clenches his fist in the air) He will be mine!
To be continued...
YOU ARE READING
Fandom Fiction
RandomIn this book you will find various things having to do with various fandoms. There's really no telling what will be involved though, there could be quotes, fanfiction, or even crack, so hold onto your butts. *\(^o^)/*
