You know it isnt good just by the way her eyes glare with fire, the way her lips curl at the excact precise spots, the way her eyebrows angle causing her nose to scrunch and her facial features to smirk. The way everything in this room stood still. The way Michael avoids making eye-contact with no one-but the ground, the way he fixes his his hair as Stacey begins to speak.
"Look. Bella, can i call you Bell?" She says with the venom in her voice as she slowly puts one leg over the other. I squeeze the mixtape in my hand and dont move a single inch of my body.
"Well Bell," She says throwing her hair over her shoulder then looks at Michael "We both decided that it would be best..." She trails off as my heart beats faster and faster. She taps her fresh manicured nails on her chin as she smirks once again.
I can practically hear the sound of my heartbeat in my ears and the sound of her low chuckle making it way to me.
"If you left." She states and my eyes did not go wide. Nor did it water. I stood there, still as a statue; built ages ago not tending to move. The beat of my heart is slowing down but the beat is harder than ever before pounding in my ears.
It was like one of those movie-like moments where the whole world before me stopped.
"But" She says tapping her chin once again "Not yet." she says in a 'villian-like' voice. The way her voice rises in between words. The way she tiltls her head at me and how her eyes flicker beween Michael and I.
"I, and my mother; Cathy arranged it actually." She pauses then smiles "after you finish your therapy sessions."
It takes me a while to comprehend on the vemonous words coming out of her mouth. Leave?
I cant leave. This is my home. My home ever since dad and I moved here.
My home ever since Michael came and lived with me.
This is my house. She cant have it with a dying relationship with Michael.
I look down at feet uncomferatably. Not finding the right words to speak. Different sentences come to mind to yell at her and Michael but none of them come out. Its silent.
I'm silent. As i become the mute i was made to be.
-
I slowly walk to my room as Stacey brings up a topic to Michael that him seem interested to discuss about. I creak open my door and step inside revealing the ray of lights coming from the street lamps out side making its way into my bedroom.
Its currently 10 pm and pitch black outside of this very building. With stars shining and people crying. Cars driving and teens dying.
Then there's me.
A sad teenage girl who blames her sleepless nights lying awake from insomnia. Wondering when could i ever get peace in my mind.
I lay awake looking once again at my ceiling. My eyes arent tired at all. I feel. Nothing.
Like i'm floating on my bed, not feeling a single inch of my blanket, not even the heartbeat that seems to beat slower and slower as i breathe faster. I stand up rummaging through my drawers looking for the two items that seem most important in my life.
I take my new mixtape and press play slowly walking again to my bed putting it sown in front of me as i cross my legs together.
I skip where Luke talks during it, not wanting to shed anymore tears, and start track 1.
"All apologies" of course.
I turn up the volume loud, so the music lets go of all my thoughts and problems as they seem to all disappear as i close my eyes.
I feel high as i sway back and forth tot he music smiling to myself at all the wonderful memories i've had with this song. But stop as i realize how foolish i feel.
I intertwine my fingers together, still listening to the music. Looking down at the cassete playing, visible scratches and old band stickers from Luke peeling off cathc my attention. But even though it does; i leave it.
I lay back closing my eyes once again.
Forgetting Michael.
Stacey.
Cathy.
and everything else. But only one thing stays on my mind.
Luke.
"Where's the mixtape Bella?" Luke asks looking through my drawers. i zip open my backpack throwing it over to him as he catches it.
"Do you ever listen to it?" He asks me sitting down on my spinny chair playing around with the mixtape in his hands. I sahke my head opening my blinds as sun rays find their way shining bright into Luke's eyes and he quickly turns away groaning.
"Why not?" He asks me once again. This boy is full of questions isnt he? He takes off his red flannel throwing it onto my bed, him wearing only just a white shirt.
I dont play it because i have nothing to listen to it with. I practically say without really speaking. He tilts his head smirking at me. My cheeks flush slightest of pinks as his tounge grazes over his lip ring causing my stomach to errupt in butterflies.
"Do you not have a player?" He says taking one out of his super skinny jeans having trouble as they are too tight for his body.
He puts the mixtape in where it belongs and presses play skipping "our song"
He puts the volume all the way as he throws the player onto my bed, it falling on top of his flannel.
"You listen to nirvana right?" He says clarifying the obvious and i roll my eyes nodding my head. "Have you heard anout a girl?" He asks me and i nod my head him groaning.
"Ugh, isnt there any song you havent listened to?" He says smiling and i crack a grin. He walks over to me slowly singing to himself as he stand right infront of me.
Hell, he's taller than 90% of the worlds population. Looking up at him makes my neck hurt. He sorta bends down, short enough to give my neck a comfortable postition to adust upon and he smiles. He puts a hand on my back, and the other one slowly making its way to my head so its resting on his chest
"Why are you so short?" He says, not to me in general. But just broadly and i laugh. why is he so tall?
I shrug as he sings the lyrics a little louder
"I stand in your line, i do hope you have the time, i do-" He suddenly stops singing as he notices me snuggled in his chest humming along to the lyrics.
I look up at him with a confused look on my face as his cheeks are blazing red and he smiles.
These werent any smile, no. Not those famous Luke Hemmings smirk, or when he bites his tounge, or when he's picking up chicks.
No, the smile he has on his face right now, is a smile of genuine; happy.
-
sorry ok? i dont even have an excuse anymore i just suck. OHMG 35K YOU GUYS ARE INSANE ILYSM. reward-chapter june 6th 2014 I PROMISE.
*whispers* i love yoooouuuuuuu
