The Outsiders- It's A Battle

Freak Out - Chapter Twenty-Six

Sodapop and I are on the way to the lake in Darry's old truck. We could have walked, but it took a while to get there. I didn't know whether to tell Soda about what Ponyboy said yesterday or not. I wanted to talk to someone about and I could trust Soda, but I don't know if I'm ready to talk about it yet. I couldn't wait to get to the lake, I was ready for some fun.

Sodapop pulled the car into the lake parking lot and I hopped out of the car. We went down to the lakeside and took a seat next to each other on the sand. Neither of us had said much today, I wasn't in a talking mood, but I don't know what Soda's deal is.

"The water's pretty, isn't it Soda?

"Sure is."

"Sodapop, can I talk to you about something?"

"You can talk to me about anything."

"Okay. Yesterday Ponyboy said he liked me and I told him that I liked him too. Cause I do, but what if I also like someone else."

He kind of just stared at me, dumbfounded.

"You can like 'em both, but you have to pick someone sometime. You can't hurt nobody."

"Okay."

That hadn't helped much. I can't believe it, but Soda was one of those people I liked. I couldn't tell him though. He stood up and reached down to help me up. I took his hand and stood up.

"Where we going?"

"The water."

I took my cover up off, revealing my swim suit. It was a two piece that had polka dots on it. Soda took his shirt off and dropped it to the ground, he had worn his swim trunks here.

He took off toward the water and I followed him. I ended up losing him under the water. I was standing right where the water starts getting deep. All of the sudden I was pulled under the water, someone had my ankle. I opened my eyes under the water to see Soda smiling at me. He pulled me onto his shoulders then stood up.

"You scared me!"

"Why?"

"Because, you pulled me under the water!"

"I was just playin', didn't mean to scare you."

"Well, it's alright."

Soda leaned over causing me to fall into the water. "Hey!"

He laughed and so did I. He started walking toward me with his arms out for a hug. I looked him over once, he had no shirt on. I couldn't do it, but he didn't know why. Only Steve knew why I was afraid of it all.

I didn't know what it was about touching guys when they weren't fully clothed, I just knew I couldn't do it. I turned around to face away from him pretending that I hadn't seen his gesture to hug.

When I turned around to look at him though he looked crushed. He threw his arms out again and when he got about five inches away I put my head down and shook it no.

"You alright?"

"I'm fine Soda."

"Why can't I hug ya'?"

"I've said it before Soda, I'll say it again, put a shirt on."

"Why does it bother you?"

I knew I could tell Soda, but it always hurt to say it out loud.

"I'll tell you some other time. If I tell you now it'll make me cry."

"If you don't want to tell me you don't have to, but I'm here for ya'."

"I know Soda, thank you."

"Can I tell you something?"

"Of course!"

"I like you."

That sentence simple as it was made me squirm in every way possible. I liked him too.

I stuttered out, "I like you too." I just about fell over into the water because I couldn't steady my breathing. Soda walked behind me and put his hand on my back.

"Shh. It's alright."

I was getting light headed. Why didn't this happen when I was with Ponyboy? Maybe it was something about Soda.

I fell over and couldn't get myself steady. Sodapop held me up so that I wouldn't drown.

"What's wrong?"

I couldn't speak, I was breathing too hard. I knew there was no way to stop this except passing out. I couldn't stop this. I clumsily turned around so that I was facing Soda. He had worry all over his face.

I put my hand on his shoulder and shuddered. "I'm alright."

"What happened?"

"My mom said stay away from guys and ever since then I've become worse and worse when it comes to things like this."

"If you ever need to talk, I'm right here."

"Thank you."

I started crying, the last few minutes had been rough. I was ready to just pass out, I was done.

"Let's go sit on the beach for a while," I said.

We walked back to the beach and sat down. Soda put his shirt back on and as soon as he did I leaned over and hugged him tight. He had wanted one earlier and I needed one.

He laughed and hugged me back. I started laughing for a reason unknown to me and I couldn't stop. Soda started laughing too. Now we were having fun, today had been pretty good after all.