Cruel Trust

Thirty-Two

When I left the office at 5:00pm, I went home, took a shower, and changed clothes. I needed to wash this day away before I figured out my next move. 

When I was finished showering, I put on a pair of ripped jeans and a thin hooded sweatshirt, left my hair to air dry, and shoved my feet into a pair of sandals. When I got outside, the sun was behind the clouds, and it had cooled off. Hopping up into my car, I drove toward Julia's.

But something in me made me turn the other direction and head toward the other side of town. Before I knew it, I was in front of Liam's house. The gate was open and the front porch lights were on.

Andrew would be livid if he knew I were even within five miles of this house, but I just couldn't stop myself. I pulled far enough down the street that my car was out of sight and crept back down the sidewalktoward the gate. My heart was pounding out of my chest, but my feet somehow kept walking. I didn't know what I would do if I saw Liam; I had no plan. I almost turned around, but something in me kept pushing me forward.

When I reached the house, I froze. I needed to figure out if he was home, so I looked left and right before I could change my mind, ran up the front stairs, rang the doorbell, and ducked behind the huge bush to the right of the porch. I held my breath and waited, eyes glued to the door, but no one came. I sat down hard on my butt behind the bush and sighed. Then it hit me: Liam wasn't stupid. Hiding from the cops, the last place he'd be was his house, for God's sake.

"Damnit!" I cursed, hitting my fist on my knee. This was useless—sitting under this bush in front of his empty house. What was I proving? Besides my idiocy? I pushed myself up on my palms and brushed the grass off my butt, walking back toward my car when I heard a vehicle approaching. I ducked around the corner of the house, peeking around another bush.

In a moment, Julia's car pulled into the driveway and my heart skipped a beat. What the hell is she doing here?

She stepped out of her Civic and I noticed that she looked like utter hell. Her hair was greasy, pulled up into a knotted mess on the top of her head. She was wearing wrinkled sweatpants and an oversized black t-shirt. Her black horn-rimmed glasses were perched on her nose, a sure sign that she had put zero effort in—she only wore her glasses when she was sick.

She trudged up the stairs, and I ducked down further toward the ground, hardly breathing. I heard the key turn in the lock, and she slipped inside, not bothering to close the door all the way. I gasped, knowing this was my chance to get in and snoop around. I stood up slowly, tiptoed up the stairs, and slid in the door, careful not to make a sound. My sandals were soundless on the tile floor, and I sidled around the corner of the foyer, looking for Julia. She had gone into the kitchen and was leaning against the counter, pen scratching furiously on a sheet of paper.

I slid into the hall closet, pulling the double doors closed with as little noise as possible. I watched her from between the slats in the door, still hardly breathing. She was still scribbling, writing at top speed. After five minutes, she stopped, tossing the pen down on the counter and jogging up the stairs. I waited until I heard her footsteps above me and slid out of the closet. I started to go read whatever she had written, but I heard her slamming around and knew she'd be back any second. I slid into the pantry this time, so I could see when she descended the stairs. Right then, Julia was coming back down the stairs, but now she had a duffel bag in one hand. She didn't look my way, and the next thing I knew, she was gone, the house falling silent.

I stayed put for a moment, and when I was sure she was gone, I eased open the door and slipped out, walking to the counter to read whatever she had written for Liam. I leaned on my elbows to read her words.

Liam,

I don't really know where to start, so I'm just going to say it: I'm done. I can't do this anymore. I've hurt Charlotte far more than I ever intended, and I don't even recognize the person I see when I look in the mirror. I've become the worst version of myself, and while I know ultimately it's my fault—I'm an adult and I make my own choices—you had a hand in this too. You took it too far, Liam. I never asked you to physically hurt her...I certainly never wanted you to shove her down the stairs and make her lose her baby. And you know what's fucked up, Liam? You fucking knew she was pregnant. I told you that. And you still did what you did. I can't stand by anymore and be a part of this sick, twisted game you've created. And I know I was co-creator. But this has to stop, Liam. You've crossed a line, and I will no longer be a part of it.

Furthermore—if you don't leave Charlotte & Andrew alone, I will go to the police. I'll tell them everything. I'll tell them what you did to me on Thanksgiving, I'll even tell them the stuff no one knows...I don't have to write that here, Liam, you know what I'm talking about. I know I'll have to face the consequences too, but I'm prepared to do that. Just leave them alone, Liam. I swear to God, I won't keep my mouth shut any longer if you don't. I took all my stuff from upstairs, so you have no reason to ever contact me again. Leave me alone, and leave Charlotte alone, unless you want the world knowing ALL your secrets.

—J

By the time I was finished reading, my heart was thumping wildly in my chest. Liam knew I was pregnant? Jesus, that's evil. But this proved one thing; Julia was sorry for what she had done. She hadn't had a clue that I was here or was going to ever lay eyes on that letter. I chewed my bottom lip and considered this. Did it make a difference? I couldn't deny that it did, even if only a little. This, coupled with the mental illness she had revealed, softened me a bit. 

I pulled my phone out of my hoodie pocket and snapped a photo of the letter. Leaving it on the counter, I slipped out the door, not bothering to look at anything else. I ran to my car and sped away from the curb, heading back toward the condo.