drowned ✔️

• t w e n t y - n i n e •

The same emotions flooded between us, utter lust enticing him to press me up against his door. His lips played with mine, his tongue dancing across my open mouth.

"Wait," he breathed into my mouth, his words a whisper, unstable and ignorable. My fingers looped around his waistband, brushing against his skin tauntingly. His groan was motivation enough, and I ran my touch along his spine, a smile curling around my lips. "You came here to talk?"

His words were enough to pull me back into a clearer frame of mind, and I leaned away from his touch in a sigh.

"You're right. I'm sorry," I apologized, my gaze shifting to the floor. "I just couldn't help myself."

"Well, I certainly don't mind," he chuckled, stepping away from me. "But you probably do."

"Uh, yeah... I just wanted to explain the entire thing with Leon in the parking lot today," I rambled, my thoughts trying to focus on an individual one.

"You don't have to," Rhys soothed, rubbing his hands against my arms. "You don't have to tell me anything you don't want to."

"I do want to tell you this. You should know. You deserve to know," I stated, resigned on making the right decision for the first time in two years. "After my mom and my sister died... I needed a change. I couldn't understand why I survived. My mom and my sister... they were both so much better than me. I felt... lost. Leon gave me the ability to breathe again. He let me do the things that terrified me, hell, he did them with me, and I finally felt alive again. But then he left. He left without a warning and I was all alone again and I didn't know what to do. I started slipping away again. Losing myself in this character I created.

"Then Drama happened. I met you, and it felt better. You reminded me that I still had a life left, and that I could still fix the mistakes I had made when I was with Leon.

"So I did. I got better: at school, at feeling, at everything. I wanted to feel worthy of living again. I wanted to make my mom and my sister proud. I wanted to make my dad proud.

"But then Leon came back. And with him, came all of the emotions I felt when I was with him. That same helplessness. The jolt of energy that only an adrenaline rush could give me. The bad and the good all came flooding back.

"He wanted to explain why he left, but I didn't want to hear it. I don't want to know why he left because I don't want to become the person I was when I was with him again. I want to be me. The real me."

Rhys smiled at me, and without saying anything, pulled me into a tight embrace.

"If it's any consolation, I like this version of you better too," he whispered in my ear, as I surrendered into his arms.