BROKEN

1 ~ Heroes and Villains

" It's going to be alright kiddo! Don't worry, they're just a bit shocked that is all..." I hear my grandfather say as I hug him a little tighter. " It's been two years now! Two freaking years! They aren't shocked anymore, this excuse died out ages ago! Why can't they just be understanding and support me? Don't they see that I suffer? That I am bullied at school? That I am picked at even in the streets? That this is already hard enough as it is? All they ever think about is money and their reputation! They want to be the picture perfect family with immaculately ironed clothes, the best grades in town and an expensive mansion, that go to church on every Sunday, has never had any member of their family sent to prison, are in perfect health, wealthy... And of course a gay son doesn't fit in that picture!" My grandfather doesn't respond, he just dries my tears and hugs me again.

That is my last memory with my grandfather before he died, May 21st 2012, two years ago. He was called Owen Alvin Harrington, was born the 22nd of March 1929. He enrolled in the British army during the Second World War at the age of only 14. When I asked him why he enrolled this young he would always tell me that there was no age to defend his country. He was my hero since I was a kid, and knowing that he and my grandmother would support me no matter what always helped me through tough situations. Scarlett Natalie Harrington, loving wife, caring mother and affectionate grandmother. Now, when I started this book I didn't want it to be about some kind of hero or a happily ever after book, because that is not what life is like. Heroes don't exist. You only see people as heroes. What I hate about these happily ever after books, is that they never talk about these so-called "villains", they never tell you what they've been through, what they do when the "heroes" have overcome them, what they become when the book is finished. Nobody cares if they die, or end up in jail, or get married and have children, or continue their lives like nothing ever happened. These "villains" have feelings, a family and perhaps all that the "hero" accomplished was stopping someone from saving their loved ones. People or not just black or white, you either see their white side or their black one, there are always two sides to a story.

"James William Allen, I am talking to you!" A voice comes disturb my daydream. "Um... What? Excuse me Mother..." I answer, not sure of what is going on. " I have asked you already five times to dress the table. We have important guests coming tonight, so stop daydreaming about whatever you gays dream about and obey!" She shouts. Gay. That is all I'll ever be to her, gay. I may have the best grades in my class, have been accepted in the best law school, have never failed a class, have always been polite to guests and clients, being gay annuls everything. I look at the floor while pronouncing a feeble "Yes, Mother" and reluctantly walked to the dining room to dress the table.

My parents are called Anne Christine Allen and Philip Michael Allen, aged respectively of 40 and 67 years old. There is a huge age difference between them which my maternal grandparents did not approve at all. My father was very rich and they believe that Anne married him just for his money, and I would lie if I said that I thought otherwise.

The guests arrived about an hour later. By that time, I was in my room again. I never really thought about why they always invited "important" guests during Christmas week. Now that I really think about it, they've done that only since my coming-out, but why? I had no idea.

Before, these evenings were spent playing with the presents we had received for Christmas. For Olivia, this hasn't changed, but for me, it has, a lot too much. What used to be exciting is now pure sadness. I lay down on my bed in the dark and cry myself to sleep, remembering the old times.