Mistletoe And Wine

Great Big White World

A/N sorry it's been a while guys. Had a lot going on. Hopefully this will convey the emotion I wanted it to! Happy reading.

Hands were all over me. Pulling my hair, caressing my hip, holding the back of my head and pressing my face into cold, hard pavement. My chest stung, my forehead burned. All I could think of was the pain. Every nerve inside me felt like it was under attack. Maybe pain was all I was put on this earth for, because pain was one of the only things I've ever known.

I wasn't blind. I knew my parents had had problems. That caused me pain as a child, and as I grew older I thought I was depressed. Like any other teen I thought the world was ending around my feat and I was in emotional pain all the time. No one understood me, no one was ever on my side and everything was horrible.

And then I knew real pain when I lost my parents. The emotional pain that would cripple anyone; teen or otherwise. The physical pain of being raped, and hit was something I had been introduced to recently and it haunts me even in my sleep, as it did now. I knew this was a dream, but I still felt powerless to stop what was happening, and that was the worst kind of psychological pain: believing you are powerless or at fault.

As I opened my eyes I realized that nightmares are dreams too and that any torture I thought I had undergone before was nothing compared to waking up somewhere you didn't know where you were. Waking up with the panic of having the instinct to get out but having no where to go. It felt like you were a caged animal. You were hurt, possibly damaged on the inside from invasiveness of man, scared, and you had learned the secrets of your mom you never wanted to know. 

Will...he was stuck with that woman. That was pain in itself.

I throw back the blankets and attempt to swing my legs over the edge of the bed. Instead of a clean get away, I manage to tangle my legs up into the blankets and trip, landing with an oof and a thud on the floor. My jaw vibrates with the impact of the floor on the bone.

I whine before pushing up and detangling. Kicking the blankets, I go open the door a smidge to peek out into the hallway. Arlen is standing out there with a knife in his hand, picking at his nails. I smile at him thinly when he looks up at me and close the door again. Signing, I try the window next.

The window is thin, and not very wide, but if I squeezed, I might be able to fit through. I slide open the window and test to make sure even my head will fit through. Luckily, I don't have a very big head and it does fit through. Keeping an eye on the door, I pull the vanity chair over and step up onto it before lifting my right foot up and out the window.

Feeling like an acrobat, I grab the sill with both hands and carefully hoist my other leg out. I shimmy my hips through and squeeze my chest through, getting stuck. My spine feels like something pointy is being jabbed through it where I'm stuck at, but I pry my way out. I land in a crouch in the yard, knocking my head on the side of the house. The stars clear quickly.

I take off running down the street. Get to Will...I repeat this over and over again. Get to Will...Get to Will...

I see a cop car cruising down the street. Wave my arms in the air. "Hey! Stop! Hey! Help me!" I pound my open hand on the drivers window as they pull to a stop and the cop cracks the window. He has brown hair and dark eyes and a square, young face.

"Are you okay?"

"No! Look, these guys kidnapped me, and I think my little brother is in danger!"

"Wait...aren't you the girl whose parents did the murder/suicide?"

"I'm telling you I need your help now and you're worried about my parents? Are you retarded? Please, help me get to my brother!"

"Okay, okay, get in, Stella."