The Babysitter

Intoxicated

Sammy

Mister and Miss Delacy were on a date. They were a perfect husband and wife. He worked at an investment firm and she was an interior designer. They lived together with their two children in a mid-century modern home on West Valley Lane.

I was never with them in the morning but I imagine he was up at 4 am working out. It was how he kept his toned body firm. I could hear him saying, "one more, one more" under his breath. He was the kind of man that pushed through the pain. He even liked it probably, liked the feeling of blood-swollen muscles. I had never seen him workout and I didn't really know if he did, but it didn't matter because that's how I saw him. Every woman deserves a man like that. A man who shows up and puts in work. And boy oh boy was his body, working.

At 5 am they would meet in the shower and make love. Sometimes it was slow and sensual and others it was not. Sometimes he was a different man, a violent one. He would take her from behind, pushing and pulling her into him. He pressed her against the tile, firmly grasping her flesh with his sandpaper hand and wrapping her neck with the other as he devoured her. He would turn her face and kiss her lips, passing from top to bottom, sucking and biting them. He was ravenous. Sometimes he would leave bruises on her and she would have to cover them with extra makeup. They would finish, then hold one another under the water. He would always kiss her as the final act, no matter what. It didn't matter if he was angry over a fight or upset because of a disappointment, he would always kiss her. Always. Because it's the lips that link souls together. I had never seen them passionately kiss but I knew that's how it was. They were that kind of couple.

They had gone to dinner and the movies and I expected them home around 11:30. It was 7:30 now. Bobby splashes in the tub, giggling. He is a happy 4-year old with blonde(ish) brown hair. Lucy sits on the toilet reading Dr. Seuss. She tucks her feet underneath her, criss-cross applesauce style and continues to stumble and laugh through funny sounding rhymes. I pull Bobby out and he whines about the cold. I quickly dry him off with his favorite Spiderman towel. His hair is matted and messy and he shakes the water out like a dog. We all laugh and I wonder if this is what being a mother feels like. I was like a mommy. Mommy two. That's what Bobby calls me. He likes to call me that. I like it too.

I have been their babysitter for most of junior high and all of high school. I've had my permit since I was 16 and my birthday is merely two days away. 18 and freedom here I come. I'll trade in this stupid learners permit for an unrestricted license. A perfect birthday present to me. The icing on the cake would be a new car, but that's a long shot to never. As of right now, I'm stuck driving my parents Kia. I've been babysitting for nearly 7 years. God, please give me freedom, I don't want anything else. I don't want a boyfriend, anything from Urban Decay or those cute boyshorts at VS Pink. I don't want a relationship with a hot, older man. All I want is a car and a life without restriction. Please, if you can do me one favor in the near future, I would appreciate it. I'm tired of borrowing their car and even more tired of facing a thousand and one questions when I do. Where are you going? Who are you going with? Don't forget, you can only have one friend in the car. God, it's annoying. They never just say "yes." When I asked them about possibly getting a car for my birthday, they gave me the "maybe" speech, which is parental code for no without bearing guilt. I will never be that way with my kids. I will tell them straight to their face. Yes or no. That's it. No beating around the bush.

I get Bobby and Lucy into bed and read to them before tucking them in for the night. This is the part I love the most. I like it when they fall asleep. Their eyes drifting to some distant shore with pirates and unicorns, purple skies and all the crazy, unrestricted dreams I wish I still had. They're so perfect and everything in their world is perfect. I wish they were my own and I could be with them all the time. I flip on the Batman night light and quietly shut the door behind me.