My Poetry Collection

motherhood is a curse

- TRIGGER WARNING -
MISCARRIAGE

You can't imagine the rush of joy I felt
When I saw that positive sign
A symbol of my yearning
The product of His design

I told my partner firstly
Then my mother and father too
My friends came next, and colleagues second
All eager to meet you

I pondered names for hours
And shopped for baby clothes
I bought stuffed toys and teddy bears
and socks for tiny toes

I don't know how long I carried you
Singing lullabies to a corpse
As I dreamt wishfully of your future
Which, by pain, had now been warped

The doctors said at least six days
It may as well have been a year
In the end, it didn't matter
Because you'd never make it here

I wept openly as I lost you
The blood soaking through my briefs
The pain itself was nothing
in comparison to my grief

The doctors smiled so sadly
False sympathy, clear as day
They gave me pills for the agony
And sent me on my way

The councillor said it was common
And provided tissues for my tears
In that room, I felt so smothered
A most depressing atmosphere

My partner sat beside me,
Forlorn and racked with pain
"We'll try again," they told me
And I burst into tears again

To this day, I don't forget you
My child without a name
And although I never knew you
I love you all the same

A/N

Don't worry, I'm okay. This poem is not written from personal experience (I've never been pregnant nor will I be anytime soon) but sadly, I do know others who have miscarried. I apologise if this made any of you feel upset. If anyone wants to talk about any personal issues in relation to this, feel free to message me.

art credit: "Miscarriage" - Curtis Wiklund