[Excerpt] Keeping Up Appearances

Chapter Two

Class continued on with not a lot of people paying attention to me sitting next to Xander past some staring and a little whispering.

I was sure I felt Jason staring at me in shock, but I couldn't look at him again. It wasn't even that hard not to; just the thought of now seeing the face I'd dreamt about for so long made my eyes hot. Especially when I couldn't stop picturing him kissing Nancy. At least, along with that thought, I also got angry with myself for reacting like such a pansy and that helped me keep the tears at bay.

When the bell finally rang, I grabbed up my stuff and swept out of the room before anyone could stop me. How I thought I'd be able to avoid Jason or Nancy for the rest of the day when I was stuck in this veritable prison, I don't know. But, I was going to take a red hot college try at it.

I hurried to my locker, heedless of whether people were or weren't staring. Given my luck, the whole school already knew about Xander's little stunt. But in reality, it would take at least until about half-way through Recess before everyone found out that Jason Thomas' best friend had been seen canoodling with his arch nemesis. I just had to hope that I could avoid all three of them until... Well, the end of time was preferable at this point.

My heart thudded painfully in my chest as I grabbed my next books – as though putting off going to Math was going to help me face it when I finally got there. Finally, I slammed my locker closed and trudged to my classroom, the one I shared with Jason and Nancy.

When I got to the room, Jason was sitting on the window sill and Nancy was between his legs. They were whispering something and shooting glances towards the door. The three of us froze when they saw me, which annoyed the kids following me into the room. But, my heart just looked at them with tears pouring down its little face and motioned they go around us. I took a seat on the other side of the room and waited for the teacher, wondering how we'd got ourselves into this whole mess.

I mean, why was Jason feeling so awkward? As far as he knew, he'd hooked up with one of his best friends and just neglected to tell his oldest friend. How was that awkward for him? Other than the fact I couldn't think of a single time in over ten years that Jason and I had ever hid something from each other. Well, there was the topic of the raging crush I'd had on him for about ten years... But, aside from that!

Nancy bloody well better be feeling awkward; just yesterday she was encouraging me to declare my feelings for him... Like full on coaching me to use my best words and to smile prettily and not choke – she knew what I was like when it came to my crush for Jason. We'd gone through the exact speech like a hundred times and she'd told me she was sure he'd be reciprocal.

But, then how did she know?

What had they talked about behind my back?

Oh my God, what did they talk about behind my back?

Blood rushed to my cheeks as I wondered what she'd told him. If she'd told him! Had they been off making out this whole time? Hiding the fact they were together the whole time? Only stopping their make out sessions long enough to laugh at me behind my back because of my stupid crush?

What else could it be?

Why hadn't they told me they'd hooked up?

Nancy had had plenty of time to tell me the day before.

Simple fact was; Jason must know everything. That had to be why they hadn't told me. Jason knew and Nancy knew and they couldn't tell me because they thought I'd make a scene.

Well you sort of did, you idiot.

Why else made sense?

I had never felt so embarrassed or ashamed and my cheeks reminded me of that fact hotly. I knew it wasn't my fault I'd fallen for Jason. But, maybe if I'd mooned over him less with Nancy, something – anything – would be different. They at least wouldn't have hidden it from me and then I could have expected it. Wouldn't have been completely sideswiped by it. Wouldn't have gone mega freak-out, back away swiftly over it.