CHAPTER FIVE

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Ihsan placed back the Diary with a smile on her lips, she descended the staircases and joined her parents in the dining table. She ignored them and served herself, all in an attempt to show them she was angry."Won't you let me feed you today? Or are you angry?" Came Maama's voice, as it was laced with care. She had been feeding Ihsan since she came back, she made a promise to fill for the things she hadn't had the chance to. She wanted to have good memories with her daughter.Ihsan stubbornly looked up, shook her head as No and dug in her food, she was eating as if it was a medicine. Her hatred towards heavy food knew no bound, she loved the foods that aren't healthy to her."Ihsan, Daada is very sorry. Don't you realise it's because I love you? Couldn't you fathom that I care for you, that's why I won't let you go? I don't trust you far away from me, I'll be worried, and so your mother," Daada spoke in a placating way. He didn't like this side of Ihsan. He would only see this of her, towards other people, but not to him, her Daada.Tears clouded her view, she saw nothing wrong. Yes! She knew she's a sickler, but would be sticking to one environment prevent her from falling ill or dying when it's time? No. Why wouldn't they let her? She wanted to enjoy her life before it's her time to leave."Daada, I see nothing wrong with going abroad to study. It would be like a new phase of my life, I'll get exposed to the world, have some fun before I die. Me sticking here won't make any change, it won't prevent me from falling ill, nor could it make me like a normal person. I see nothing here you couldn't understand. Let me go, please," she pleaded, her hands were raised in a pleading gesture, tears were rolling down her cheeks. She just wanted to go, so bad.Daada and Maama heaved a sigh at the same time. They knew how adamant Ihsan could be, but never in their life imagined her to be so adamant like this. Wouldn't she let their words dive in her heart? Why couldn't she just realise that everything they're doing is for her benefit?"Ihsan, why don't you understand our feelings? We care for you. I'll miss you so much, Ihsan. Couldn't you study here? For me to make up all the times I haven't been there for you? I want to make good memories of you, not your tears and stubbornness," Maama spoke softly, as the tears she had been holding cascaded down her cheeks. She wanted her daughter so bad, she knew she wasn't a thing in her daughter's heart, for she left her when everything she needed was her. But why couldn't she realise she had lamented? There was nothing in her heart but remorse and regret."Ihsan, I know you might think that we're always holding you back, we aren't letting you have fun, we always put barriers between you and lively materials. Ihsan, all this is for your good. What if since in the plane you get sick? What if you went there in a week and fell ill? Who will take care of you? Who? Ihsan," Daada spoke in a soft, yet angry tone. He's tired of Ihsan's pugnacious behaviour, she's such a hard shell to crack."Enough of the what-ifs, Daada. I'll understand that maybe the US is too expensive for you, though I know who you are. It isn't a big deal, you can send me to even Cotonou or ghana, I just want to leave Nigeria, I want to know how it feels. Please, Daada," she pleaded, her attention was fixed on Daada, she wanted him to agree. She couldn't even spare Maama a look, as she wasn't important to her sometimes."I have enough money. Enough money that if I want, you would only study for a semester in each country of this world, until you finish your studies. Money doesn't matter to me, but your health does," Daada informed, dictating every word of his. He meant it, he was a popular business tycoon in the whole of Lagos state. How would Ihsan say it was the money that might be holding him back?Ihsan abruptly stood up, tears were washing down her face in an unstoppable manner. She looked at Daada, her eyes emoting how beseeching she was "Daada since you have the money, please, I beg of you, let me go. Also know, this would be the last time we will talk about this. Let me go and I'll bring back the jovial and loving Ihsan. Not letting me would be like me packing to Abbu's house, with my smile and happiness vanishing," she spoke through gritted teeth, emphasizing her words, they knew her, and that assured them she meant it.She left the dining area without uttering another word, her heart was hurting. "Ihsan, come back and eat your food, you'll be weak," Maama called."I am okay. My happiness is my priority than my health," she spoke with full sarcasm, irritatingly.Maama looked at Daada helplessly, of which he flashed her the same look. "Alhaji, I think we should try Abbu's advice, it might work," she said, as she stood up and sat close to him."Jamila, I'm afraid she would agree. I don't want this to happen," Daada whimpered, as he took her hands in his, in an attempt to placate himself."We should just give it a try, I'll call her down, now," Maama said and headed for Ihsan's bedroom.***Ihsan sat far away from both her parents, her face was red from all the cryings, her eyes had already swelled up, as she was still sniffing.They all felt pained, this wasn't their usual, they were used to her warmth, her whines, and feign tears. They have to act fast, or else their daughter is slowly slipping away.Daada looked at her, his eyes emoting his enshrouded neurosis. He spoke in a halting tone "I think I'll let you study abroad, Ihsan, but you also have to do one thing, you'll get married, for I can't let you in another country all by yourself," Came Daada's shaky voice, one could tell by his voice that he was anxious and was afraid of what might be her answer.Ihsan slowly lifted her face, her gaze falling on Daada's face, who was looking anywhere but her face. It swiftly somersaulted in her that it might be a trick, for he knew she wasn't ready for marriage and would think it will stop her from holding onto her words. A wide grin crept out of her face as she imagined herself in the US, attending her lectures, visiting all those lively places. "Well, that wouldn't be a problem for me. I wouldn't be his nanny nor would I be his cleaner. It's all okay with me. Besides, who's this guy, I already pity him. And, Daada, start processing my admission, it's a Yes."Fear and regret engulfed Maama and Daada, this was what they had been afraid to happen, they knew Ihsan so well, she might agree, all in the name of her stubbornness."It's Sadeeq, Alhaji Mustapha's son. As you know, he studies in Qatar, and you also have to study there," Daada informed, his face devoid of emotion, he sounded impotent."Daada.." she slurred and gave him a flummoxed look. "You mean the Sadeeq I know? You can't do this to me, Daada, would you? He's just 19 years old, for crying out loud. Who will take care of who? Uhm...Daada?" She wanted to bellow the words, but they came out as a whisper, as tears washed down her face. How could Daada do this to her? She thought it was all a threat. She's afraid, Daada too is adamant in his ways."Yes, he is. And he's the only guy I could trust with you, I know he would take good care of you. Besides, what's there in marrying him? Isn't he a man?" Daada inquired, his sturdy and adamant self taking over the benevolent and obsequious self."There is, it's just a one year gap between us. And he isn't a man in my eyes, I see him like a ten years old boy, how would he become my husband?" She reprimanded and broke into tears. Her heart was beating vigorously, the room started spinning around her, as her eyes became glued to everywhere but Daada's face."A year gap isn't a problem, Ihsan. Age is only a number. You should make yourself ready, for it won't take long, three weeks to be precise," Daada dictated, as a tone of finality laced in his voice."Ihsan! Ihsan!!" They called, but she seemed stiffened.Maama shook her, but only for Ihsan to collapse on the floor. Maama shrieked and let out a loud yelp "This isn't going to happen, Ihsan. Don't add more to your illness, please," she spoke petrified, tears washing down her face."It will happen, In shaa Allah. We should take her to the hospital for now," Daada said as he took Ihsan in his arms, heading to the parking lot.

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