I is a pigedoncatbirdfish ..........yah

My life

I has a father called:
Sir Mr von ashleter Stevenson brick shower water day Turd
I also has a mother her name is:
Mrs Burke von Ulster doooooorkshmer day Turd
Thats all

But then

Out of no where came a flying Turd from out of space it crashed and released many small Turds from with in. the Turds were evil and killed everyone by eating them.

The end or was it

Well it wasn't as the Turds spared as as they thought we were Turds cause our last name was day Turd you see they cant just kill us they have to send us a fancy letter before devouring us. It usually said something like:

Dear : what ever your name is
We are letting you know that you and your family are about to be digested because we feel like it and were aloud to because king Turd said we could Haha sucks to be you
Lots of love a Turd called Alfred

Ours said

Dear blah blah what ever your new is day Turd
We are letting you know that we wont be digesting you and your family because your last name is Turd so you must be one of us and your also our new king
Love a Turd called Mike

So as we were the new rulers and we hated that random innocent people died we set a decree saying that all Turds should stop and not kill random people but to kill them all.  this was what the decree looked like,

Kill all humans
Thank you
Love king day Turd
  

The actual end 👌