Dan and Phil imagines

#5: Phil finds your cuts

A/N: Hello, so i recently wrote a 'dan finds your cuts' imagine and was requested by 'That_Beirsack_Girl' again to write one but about phil finding your cuts. Hopefully this one is as good or better. If you struggle with self harm please do not read this one as it could be triggering, and feel free to message me if ou want to talk about anything as I have struggled with it myself and understand. Enjoy! (if possible)  -Courtney :)

Warnings: TRIGGERING contains self harm and swearing, please do not read if you may be triggered.

PS: play the video in the side bar while reading the last half of this, it makes it sadder and the song really fits the story.

Your P.O.V

It was a calm sunday, you were home with your boyfriend of 6 months, Phil. You and him were making cupcakes, you were having a competition to see who could make the prettiest cupcake, obviosly you won, phil had said he wanted a rematch, but that boring. "You cheated, you probably had those hidden away somewhere, you cant cook that good"  "exuse me! your gonna pay for that" He stood there a bit confused for a second. It wasnt until you had dumped the rest of the bag of flour on his head that he realized what you had meant by 'your gonna pay for that' You grabbed two eggs next, one in each hand, phil grabbed whipped cream. This was going to get really messy really fast. "now phil, you could either admit that i am a much better cook then you and my cupcake was 100 times better than yours OR we could battle to the death, your choice, ill win either way" you challenged him. He stood there thinking for a bit when out of a sudden he sprayed you with whipped cream, all down your front on your new hoodie, dammit. So thats how its gonna be. He sees the 'anger' in your eyes so he makes a run for it, hitting his hip on the corner of the table, disabiling him for just long enough for you to crack two eggs on his head. gotcha. He runs and grabs the chocolate sauce from the counter. Shit. That will stain. You run. You ran faster then you ever had in P.E class. You ran upstairs, leaving you breathless, phil close behind you. He corners you in the hallway, leaving you trapped. Now what.

Phils P.O.V

I chased her up the stairs and cornered her, I have won, I make the rules now. I walked closer to her, im ready to ruin her hoodie with the chocolate sauce I have in my hand, ready to pour on her. I am close enough now, she knoes whats about to happen, she starts wriggling and trying to push past me, I life the small bottle and squeeze, pour chocolate sause all over her feet, wow great aim phil. "thats the best you got? hahaha" She trys to push past me again so i use the oppotunity to tickle her, she wriggles and squirms even more and then slips on the chocolate sauce, perfect, i have her right where i want her. The only problem is she is squirming even more now that i have her pinned down. I place the cocolate sauce between by teeth and pin her wrist down with my hands, she winces slightly, I have no idea why but i leave it. I drop the chocolate sauce and it lands on her tummy, I release on of her wrists to pick it up, this moves her sleeve up a bit, her wrists look a bit red, maybe i should loosen my grip a bit. I use one hand to hold her wrists down and one to hold the chocolate sauce, "you ready to have all of this chocolate sauce on your face?"  "please dont phil! it will be so hard to wash off!"  "you should have thought about that before"  Her wrists wriggle free a bit so i grab them again, this time is see it, I see numerous cuts, I can feel them under my palms. She has her eyes closed, waiting for the chocolate sauce to land on her face, it takes her a second to realize its not happening, she slowly opens one eye at a time, I look into her eyes. "y/n, what is that...on your wrist?"  I hear her whisper "shit" under her breath. "please say that isnt what it looks like?"  .....  "im sorry phil"  I let her go and step back a bit. "why? why do you do it and why havnt you told me? how long has it been happening?" "phil im sorry. Its just. I dont want to talk about it"  "please y/n?" I feel a single tear roll down my cheek. She is also crying. "I dont deserve you, I dont deserve anything, all i am is a fuck up, im the reason my parents split up, im the reason you are loosinf sunscribers, they all hate me! I fuck everything up, but if im feeling that in my head but i cant actually see it, it doesnt feel real, it makes me feel crazy, if i can actually see the pain I dont feel so crazy, i feel more sane, im sorry."  she's now crying a lot, but then again, so am I. Hearing that tore me apart, how could i not have noticed that she was so sad, how could i not have noticed the cuts. I move in to hug her and she lets me. We stand there, in the messy hallway, covered in food, just hugging. She cried into my shoulder and I into hers. "please know, I truly love you, i couldnt live without you and i truly mean that, please just, try to stop, i can help you, please, i love you y/n"  "i will try but its not that easy phil" "i know, i know, im just asking that you try, ill be here the whole time" "i love you phil" "i love you too y/n." We haed to the bathroom to clean our selves up. It can only get better from here on out.