Alone

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Pic of javier (ha-vee-er) to the side.

[silence is another word for pain]

Alex

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The boys ate lunch with us, which by the way was unnerving for me, I don't know about Emi. Every time my eyes connected with Montegro's ,they seemed to stick there until I forced them to move away. I would lie if I said he wasn't a steaming ,smoking hot man but I was in no position to be aimlessly falling for a gangster bad boy, who in any case, would break my heart even more than it already was. Some police officers stopped by to drop off their belongings. The boys came and took their stuff and carried it back to their rooms. For once we saw them grin mischeviously at the officers who shot menacing glares at them. One of the officers, quite a catch really, staring to flirt with us. I shrugged it off and smiled politely. Emi smiled sweetly and she engaged in talk with them. The officers knew we were not the type to flirt excessively. We did. Just very friendly and comfortably. But I wasn't in the mood, neither was Emi. When the officers left, we started to watch movies, Pacific Rim, Transformers, Avengers and even Madea! Then Emi clearly stated that she was sleepy with a long, loud, tiresome yawn. She walked upstairs to freshen up. I stayed back.

Alone.

The whole house was dark or dimmed. I sat on the couch and just felt the tears draw crystalline lines on my face. Every single thing just flooded back into me. Every kiss. Every touch. Every moment, every memory. My lips trembled as my teeth gnawed on them.

Silence.

No one knew how much the silence spoke for me. All the pain was within  my silence. My heart clenched unforgivingly in my chest. The salty taste in my mouth. The trembles that shook my body. The incoherent words my lips managed to piece together. The throbbing pain in my limbs and head. I put my head on my knees and pulled back up, sniffling and trying to recompose myself.  I walked to the kitchen. The glass cover of the stove reflected all the damage this sorrow took on me. My eyes were red and puffy, there sinks under them. My lips were a shade deeper and bruised from all the biting. My hair was disheveled. My skin was paled. I looked like a cross between a banshee and a ghoul.

"oh God...I look horrible..." I croaked out, squinting my eyes as I opened the freezer. I pulled out some chocolate ice cream and grabbed a tub. I took a spoon and indulged myself in the 'Mexican goodness' as the label read. My shoulders heaved as I breathed. I turned from the corner and almost slammed into Montegro.

"sorry" my voice almost a whisper of what it should've been

" it's fine" he said. I looked up and he was staring down. I wasn't planning for that so I sidestepped and walked away to my room. I sat on the floor and ate my ice cream. I ate the whole tub and then went to bathe and brush my teeth. I changed into my pjays and crawled onto my bed. I fell asleep within seconds.

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