D e a n

e i g h t e e n

Guilt was beginning to come as second nature to Effy. She seemed to be feeling it more than anything else.

As she walked home, the sun setting and the streets empty, all she could let herself feel was guilt and disgust. And the most frustrating part was—she had no one else to be mad at but herself. No one to point the blame at. Here, one of her old friends (though not the kindest) was found dead in the woods, another was MIA, and all she could do was have mindless sex with Dean. As good as it felt in the moment—soon a heavyweight of woeful regret began building in her gut.

She was starting to feel alien in her own skin. None of her thoughts or actions seemed to be her own. As though someone else was taking over.

She shut her eyes in anguish.

All she wanted was for things to go back to the way they used to be. Even if it meant having to deal with the endless torment of her once friends, with Dean at her side. . . all to herself. Guilt-free. But a small part of her couldn't deny the irrevocable truth that—that may never happen. Not in this lifetime, at least.

She wrapped her arms around herself as she walked up the empty driveway of her house. When she reached for the doorknob, she realized it was left cracked open. Hesitantly, she pushed the door and stepped in. Her movements quiet and gentle. As she crept into her own house, she could hear shuffling in the kitchen. The suction of the fridge opening sounded, followed soon by something crashing to the floor.

"Shit," a low female voice hissed.

Effy exhaled as she walked into her kitchen, her face set in a grim expression.

"Astrid," Effy breathed out when she found Astrid sitting on the floor, a half-eaten Colby-Jack cheese stick in one hand, tossing pieces of lettuce and cherry tomatoes back into Lexi's fallen salad.

Effy shook her head and dropped her hands by her side. "What are you doing?"

"I was hungry," Astrid mumbled as she raised the cheese stick. Effy tossed her house keys on the countertop and yanked her bag off her shoulder so violently her hair moved up with it. Astrid pressed her lips together as she took a bite of the cheese. "You look like hell." She muttered teasingly.

Effy leaned against the edge of the countertop and crossed her arms. An unentertained expression consuming her features. In her peripheral vision, she could still see Astrid. "Yeah, well, you don't look so hot yourself." She bit in a hostile tone.

Astrid blinked.

Effy almost felt bad. But before the remorse could get to her enough to make her apologize, Astrid's lips curled into a wide grin and she started laughing.

"Yeah, I don't," She nodded in agreement as she stood to her feet and placed the container on the counter. The fridge door slowly closed on its own behind her. "But then again, when do I ever?"