Before I Die

four

Isn’t it funny how, for one moment, life can be so perfect and then, in a blink of an eye, it’s all gone? Your future, your happiness and your sanity: gone.

Sometimes, life throws these types of situations at us, ones that we’re not necessarily equipped to handle, and, usually, there’s nothing we can do about it. It’s quite pathetic, when you think about it. Humans are like sitting ducks, really: completely helpless and defenseless. 

That sort of thing happened to my family and me. I mean, before the cancer, everything was perfect; Noah had just been accepted into the university of his dreams, mum had just been awarded a promotion and dad was about to buy us all a new family car. And then?

Blink.

It was all gone.

Noah didn’t leave for university. Instead, he stayed at home and got a job to help pay for the expensive treatment. Mum started to take more shifts and not because of her promotion. And dad? Well, let’s just say that we didn’t get that new car.

It was like everything that was normal in my life had been engulfed by a huge, black hole, and in its place was a sick and twisted version of reality. It sucked. But, honestly, I think that’s one of the most amazing things about the human race – that no matter how bad the situation, we learn to adapt and live our life, pretending it was the norm, ignoring the fact that it wasn’t. 

You never know when life will throw a hurdle your way, and I guess that’s why I’m doing what I’m doing, the reason as to why I was sitting in Zeke Parker’s car, waiting for his two friends, Jay and Levi, to leave the corner shop with the alcohol for tonight’s party. And, maybe, that was the reason as to why I felt as if I were going insane. 

* * *

One week before

Following Zeke’s steps into the hallway, I unconsciously took note of the posters that plastered the school walls, advertising the winter formal. The winter formal was supposed to be a nice evening, with free food and dancing, but, sadly, it wasn’t something I was particularly fond of.

Don’t get me wrong; because I’m a girl, so of course I love the idea of dancing the night away with my date, but the only formal I had ever attended was in freshman year – and that was a pretty bad experience. So now, the thought of attending one send shivers crawling down my spine.

Pulling my attention back to the situation at hand, I quickly realised that Zeke had now turned a corner, one that led towards the changing rooms. And considering the fact that I had never seen him participating in any gym classes, let alone seeing him anywhere near the courts, – not that I had ever sought him out or anything – I highly doubted that that was his final destination. 

My lungs were beginning to burn and my breaths were becoming frustratingly shorter – a clear indication that if I didn’t catch up with him soon, it would be impossible. So I did the only thing that came into my mind at that moment. My voice bounced off the walls, echoing around the empty hallway.

Zeke froze in spot and slowly, he turned around to face me, his expression dark, though full of curiousity.

“Yeah?”

At first, I didn’t respond. Weeks later, after this moment had passed, I told myself that it was due to the fact that I was breathless – because boy, that was a far journey for someone like me to travel in such a short time span. But, at that second, I knew that it was because the boy standing in front of me, his blue eyes narrowed, had no visible flaws that stood out to me.

He was so freaking hot.

“What do you want?” Zeke asked impatiently, his voice leaking with an emotion that I was all too familiar with: boredom.

See, there are three most common type of boredom. There’s the ‘I hate you so could you please stop talking to me’ face, the ‘oh so help me, God, this lecture is so boring’, and finally, the look that Zeke currently occupied, the ‘could this chick possibly get any dumber?’ smirk. 

Needless to say, I neither appreciated being referred to by the term ‘chick’, nor being categorised as ‘dumb’. 

“I wanted to ask you for a favour,” I began nervously, blood, once again, rushing to my cheeks in embarrassment.

Zeke frowns at my answer, no doubt wondering what somebody like me could possibly want with someone like him. I was seriously starting to dislike this guy more and more within each passing second. 

“What, so you wanna hook up?” Zeke chuckles as his eyes traveled down my body, pausing at my chest when he ascended. “Look, no offense or anything, but you’re not my type.”

I literally had to refrain myself from slapping his obnoxious face right then and there.

“Are you being serious?” I ask, shocked by how annoyingly large his ego was.

“Yup. Sorry,” he pauses, his grin growing larger. “But, I do know that Jay enjoys the easy girls. You could be into that, right?”

I scoff, taking a step back. “No. I definitely could not be into that! I wasn’t even going to ask for that! What, do you think I’m a slut or something?” I pause. “Actually, don’t answer that. Just forget I said anything.”

I walked away, adjusting my oxygen tank and rubbing my sweaty palms against my shirt discreetly as I did. I nearly – nearly – stopped walking when I realised Zeke was following me.

“Is it healthy for you to be this angry?” he questions, looking down at me with his infamous smirk. I ignored him and kept my eyes focused on the winter formal poster that had been taped at the end of the hall. “Why are you ignoring me?” Zeke pushes. “In my defense, most girls only ask me for sexual favours, so what was I supposed to expect? You, Miss Number One in the Class wanted help with her calculus homework? Yeah, right.” His voice was dripping with sarcasm, and once he finished his sentence, he had the nerve to chuckle.

 I turned around, furious, and hit my index finger against his chest. Bad idea. Because then I got side tracked by his muscles, and how ripped he was. Clearly, his absence from gym class certainly was not affecting his fitness. I wonder if he works out five says a we- 

No. Focus, Nora.

“Me asking you for help on my homework is as likely as it is for me to ask you, Mr. Full of STDs for a ‘hook up’ – it’s never going to happen.” I snap before pulling my hand from his chest and turning the corner that led back to the cafeteria, where, no doubt, Abby, Eden and Ruby probably had a million questions for me. 

Zeke laughs deeply. "That sentence sure was a mouth full."

Ignore him. Ignore him. Ignore him.

Finally, I arrived at the café door and reached out to open it, though, to my frustration, Zeke grabbed my wrist before I could do so. “Care to tell me what you wanted to ask me?”

I met his artic coloured eyes, attempting to look strong and confident. Though, I knew that my cannula tubes didn’t help me to complete the look. “Drop it,” I told him firmly, failing an attempt of jolting my wrist from his grasp. “I’ll ask someone else,” I pulled at my wrist and snarled. “Let me go.”

And he did.

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- Katie and Danicus .x