the good side | t.chalamet ; book 2

19

"IT WASN'T WHAT it looked like, as cliche as it sounds, it wasn't."

Timmy sighed, he came back in the spotlight for a mer two minutes and already shit has hit the fan. the Cannes party was a mistake, he knew he was mixing with the wrong people, he knew he shouldn't have gone. but he deserved to have fun, let loose. and he was doing just that.

saoirse sighed at her lanky american friend, not really knowing what to say or do.

"she wouldn't let me explain, all i wanted to do was explain." he said, getting more frustrated by the minute.

in the time natalia and timothée had been broken up, saoirse had never seen timothée this way before. he was unreadable, he was extremely distant and it scared her. they were so close and he just shut himself up from her.

"i don't blame her, to be honest. she's going to be hurt, though she says she has no right to be, she does. she was in love with you, timmy. still is by the looks of it and neither of you wanted to break up, so what makes it worse is that you ended on such good terms whilst still being in love, and you're seen with someone else." saoirse explained. "i know you're allowed to do what you want, so is she. you've broken up so it should be fine and easy, right? but no, nothing is ever that simple."

timothée sighed at her words, at how true they were. "i was so pathetic, saorise." he chuckled weakly, "as soon as our lips touched i pulled away."

the music was thumping through his body, his eyesight was blurry because of god know what he took and drunk throughout the evening. he felt like he was in a box, everything was so close, he felt suffocated.

he didnt really know who he was talking with, but who ever it was had said that someone had been eying him up all evening, a tall blonde, across the room.

he shrugged it off more times than he could remember, until he was suddenly stood in front of her getting introduced.

he couldn't even remember her name, is that bad? his head was so fuzzy and everything was moving in slow motion. he could see her lips moving but he couldn't tell you what the hell she was saying. he just nodded along, curls thudding against his sticky forehead.

she was getting closer and closer to him throughout the time he had been with her, he hardly even noticed until her lips ghosted against his own, he took in a sharp breath and her lips were planted against his for a second until he pulled away with his hands up in the air in sheer panic.

"i'm—i'm sorry, i have a girlfriend."

and with that, he left. he couldn't breathe his head ached from whatever was put into his body. he felt sick to his stomach in guilt. his chest was tight, heart heavy. what did he just do?

"you gotta step away for a bit, tim. focus on yourself but properly this time."

he knew she was right, hell saoirse fucking ronan was always fucking right. with a name like mine, you've gotta be, she'd say all too much.

"i tried, i can't do it. i can't get over her and now she hates me so i can't get her back. i fucked up." he pulled at his hair, distressed, "why on earth did we think breaking up was a good idea? we're both hurting we loved— love each other so much, why did we think it was a good fucking idea to just destroy that?"

saoirse had never seen him raise his face his viciously before, it hurt her heart to see this side of him come to play, "you said it yourself you both thought breaking up would be better than just falling out of love or forcing a relationship to work. sometimes, time just gets in the way and you never know— maybe you two will be together soon, when the time is right."

timothée looked at his Irish friend before letting out a childish and whiney sigh, as he slopped his back against the sofa, "love fucking sucks."