The Beginning

Dance

The night before

Just as Michael closed the door in front of her, Diana put both hands over her mouth.

Why.

She didn't even know what to question first. Did she have no self control at all? How could she? 

It's Michael, for God's sake!

Everything that was still logically functioning inside made her kick herself internally.

Congratulations, Diana. Now it will be so much easier to put an end to it. Way to go.

Muttering to herself, she headed towards the bathroom. Maybe a shower would put some sense into her thick head. Diana felt like she had just woken up from an inconceivable dream and couldn't shake off the feeling of disconnection between what she had done and reality. Surely she couldn't just have made out with Michael in her living room. No.

The hot water somehow felt purifying as it washed away the dirtiness she felt. She crossed both arms around her own body, allowing her thoughts to drift off.

Can I kiss you goodbye?

Soon enough, the hot stream that ran from her chin to her torso turned into his fingers and she couldn't stop herself from wondering what it would feel like to have him making that path instead of the lifeless flow of water.

No. Stop.

She quickly opened her eyes and ran her fingers through her soaking hair. Every second she spent under the running water was a second she was reminded of his silent tears. And she could only imagine how many more there were to come.

As she weakly galvanized towards the bed in a blue silk sleepwear, she promised herself she would never touch him like that again.

She should have known though. She shouldn't make promises she couldn't keep. That battle was already lost long before she knew she would fight it.

.   .   .

Diana didn't feel like going out the next day. Strangely, she felt exposed whenever she so much looked out the window, like the whole world was suddenly aware of the line she had crossed.

She wasn't ready to face him just yet, because she didn't know what would come with that. She wanted to call him to say they'd meet at the movie studio by Monday. But she didn't have the courage, it would crush him.

But why? Did she really have to ruin the weekend just because she'd lost control for a split second?
They had planned on going to Studio 54 and she knew how Michael loved it there. It was one of the few places, besides the stage, she saw him relaxed and notoriously happy. And she loved it. She didn't want to let what happened get between that. He wouldn't go without her.

As the lonely hours went by, she decided she would put her discomfort aside and take him there. The worst thing that could happen had actually already happened, she thought, so she would try to repair it. And it was her own fault, she couldn't let it ruin their relationship. However at that moment she wasn't able to think of a solution for it or how she should approach Michael. Or even if she should approach it at all. She didn't want to deal with it anytime soon, but she needed to see him and make sure he was okay

In all honesty, she just wanted to see him. And as much as she tried to deny it to herself, in the back of her mind, she knew her reasons weren't right.

.   .   .

We're going dancing tonight, baby.

Her words replayed over and over in his mind.