Deepest desires {DISCONTINUED}

• Pause - An Intermission •

This chapter is not a part of the story, I am working on releasing chapters I just have a bit of writers block, this chapter will probably be a one off but I wanted to publish something. A lot of emotions and thought went into this, so please give it some love 💛💛

~ Mehrin

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I was walking down busy city streets
When I saw them
Two young girls, arms linked
Laughing and walking.

They seemed to be lost in a world of their own
A world decorated with fairy lights and flower petals
A world which could've been ours

Looking at them
I felt my heart ache
because it was a painful
reminder of us
this could've been our
daughters

I think of how different it would be
If I begged you to stay
Though it wouldn't change your mind
If I hadn't let my ego
In the way
If I had chased after you
Once you'd left

I spend nights thinking
wishing how you were
there at my wedding
how unfair it is
that you are unaware of the fact
that
I named my daughter after you

I cry myself to sleep because
I have experienced
one too many
Heartbreaks
but the worst one I've experienced is with you

I still remember
how you used to listen to me
go on and on
about TV shows
you didn't even care about
but acted interested
for my sake

I remember
how you got me a china mouse
for my thirteenth birthday
because I had never owned
one before

I remember
how you stayed up till two
listening to me rant about
my emotions and life

I remember
the happiness I felt
when you were around

If I could go back in time
I would have ran to your door
broken it down if I had to
and begged for forgiveness

it is too late now

you are scored on my heart
Which no one can replace
if you are reading this
I love you.

This world
will not stop for you
not for even one second

it will grab you by your hair
and drag you across a never ending field of roses
the thorns will prick you
you will fall
you will bleed
but the petals will help ease the pain

it will drag you across oceans
you will drown
you will struggle
but eventually,
you will learn to swim

it will drag you across deserts
you will suffocate
you will burn
but you will end up
blazing more fiercely
than the fire that scorched you

it will drag you across jungles
full of lions thirsty for your blood you will get hurt
you will wish to die
but you will end up
conquering the king of the jungle

it will drag you across roads
with cars speeding
towards your direction
you will be begging for help
then it will give you wings
so you can fly

and when you fly too high
it will cut your wing
and you will land painfully
and then it will say
you were so busy flying
you forgot how to land

many fail
they take away their lives
not because they are weak
but because they have forgotten how to land

being patient in a world
that wants to see you fail
is the most beautiful thing

because how beautiful
is the earth
which is constantly walked over yet the following day
one can see
the flowers bloom from it