Bad Girls | JenLisa

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(A/N: Hey guys! This update isn't exactly like the usual ones I do, but it's just a Free Verse Poem I wrote for JenLisa. You can just exit if you don't wanna read, it's okay. Just trying something new. ^^ )

Wedding Day

It's your wedding day today.
You wore a beautiful smile..
And I'm happy for you.
But I guess it's still hard for me to understand.
What went wrong exactly,
What made you hate me.
But it doesn't matter,
I'm here for you.
Because I'm your bestfriend,
Who'll always be with you until the end.

You walked out with him,
With your bouquet in your hands,
Not bothering to look,
You threw it far away.
The bouquet reached me.
And for the first time after a while,
After all these times I've been contacting you,
After all the nights I've cried because of you,
And after all the pain my love for you brought,

You finally, looked at my direction.
And then you smiled.
I wanted break down,
Tell you all the things I wanted to say..
Tell you that all I wanted was for you to stay..

But I didn't.
Yes, I couldn't.
Seeing you look at him in the eye,
Placing his lips onto yours,
It left me thinking..
I should've known..
That night, when I kissed a guy,
When I left you home,
When I tricked you,
Telling you I was going to work,
When you found out..
That's when you let me know..
You loved me.

I felt disgusted to the point that I could die,
I was a fellow woman, how could you possibly love me?
I bottled up my feelings,
My love,
My care,
I blindly pushed you away,
I told myself I was right.
But no, it was a lie.

I really loved you too.

And that's my mistake.
I never should've fallen in love with my bestfriend,
To the point where I started to hurt myself,
To the point where I considered myself a monster,
You didn't know,
I didn't let you.

Jennie, I still love you.

Even though I said the meanest things,
Even though I treated you badly,
Even though I pushed you away,
I loved you.
More than anything, or anyone in this world.
I realized,
You were the light to my dark.
And now I understand.
Why you hated me to the point where you never talked to me,
To the point where you went away from me,
To the point when you could never call me bestfriend anymore..

Because you truly loved me.
And it hurt for you,
To be oblivious of my true feelings,
To be shunned away when you wanted to listen,
To be left behind with no exact reason...
All you wanted was to reach for me,
All you wanted was to end my pain,
But all I rewarded was much more worse.

I'm so, sorry,
From the bottom of my heart,
Jennie,
I want you to know how much I care for you,
Ever since our elementary days,
To our high school days,
To our lonely university days,
And till the present day.
Thank you for everything.

Yes, today, it's your wedding day,
So I'll just go ahead, and walk away,
Dropping the bouquet,
I will look back,
And smile at you on my way,
I'll mouth the words,
"Thank you, my friend."
And,
"I love you."
I hope you're happy now,
That way, I'll also be.
Goodbye for now,
And I'll see you after a while.

- Lalisa Manoban.

(A/N: Thank you for the ones who read this, comment your thoughts if you want me to update more like this! But of course, my old format won't go away, this is just a poem after all. ^^ Sorry if it was poorly written, I ran out of many vocabulary words, but I wrote it with all my heart! That's all, haha, byeee.)