conversations // prinxiety ✔

♥ 1 - the beginning ♥

(a/n: hi! im nicky! i want to let you know that this book has lots of angst and some chapters are much darker than others. i'll definitely put warnings at the beginnings of chapters that need them but for now i'll tell you that this book mentions of self harm, suicide, and talks about anxiety disorder a lot, so if this makes you uncomfortable, don't read this book! maybe read my other one called dear virgil. if you want to keep reading however, i'll put little summaries at the ends of the chapters so you can skip over something you think you'll be triggered by)

The book's dialogue is written like a play script. I don't know why I read it so much, since it fills me with disappointment and sadness, but I do anyway. I started on the first page again.

Roman: Who is the new trait?

Patton: I don't know, but we could ask him!

Roman: He looks like he doesn't want to talk to anybody right now...

Logan: We'll greet him later. Thomas is summoning us for a video.

Patton: Okay!

And that was it for the first conversation. They never really did come to meet me afterwards.

You see, all the sides have different items that have different powers.

Logan has special glasses that can let him see through walls. Roman has a sword with rose engravings that can sense whenever danger is near. Patton has a little heart pin that he can tap to become invisible.

But me? I have possibly the lamest item ever. It's that book. It's filled with every single conversation anybody's had about me since I first appeared in the mind.

I don't let the others know what my item is, because then they'll act all fake when they talk about me and I'll be limiting them. As much as I don't like getting shit talked about, I don't want them to think they have to make me happy, because that's far from the truth.

I just want them to be happy, so that Thomas is happy.

But I wouldn't let them know that. Putting on a dark persona is the only reason I'm taken seriously.

I continued on and on through the conversations about me for the next few days after I appeared.

Roman: Why are you getting mad at me?! Get mad at Anxiety! He does nothing for you, Thomas, except for ruining your life!

Thomas: I mean...

Patton: Hey now!

Roman: I wish he'd never come here. I hate that guy.

Patton: He might seem dark, but I'm sure he has a soft side. Everyone does! Plus, do you think he wants to be Anxiety? He was created and he didn't have a choice.

Roman: Well he could choose to not be disruptive and idiotic all the time.

Thomas: He's really annoying but Patton kinda has a point.

Logan: Anxiety causes you to be very unproductive and unhappy, Thomas. I don't believe that's what you need, considering how busy you always are.

Roman: He hasn't even revealed his name to us! All of us know each other's names except for his!

Patton: I want to know his name too! But he has a reason for not saying it, right? Think about it like if you were him-

Roman: I don't WANT to be that freak!

Patton: Don't call him a freak!

Thomas: Roman's kinda right... I mean, Anxiety's just really...

Roman: Gloomy, annoying, grumpy, moronic-

Logan: Well, what could we do to solve this problem?

Patton: Imagine as if you were Anxiety! Getting taunted all the time by everyone else must be hard on him!

Roman: He deserves it.

Logan: I don't believe he quite deserves it, but with his attitude and the way he keeps Thomas from doing lots of things he could do does need some sort of punishment.

Oh, Logan. Oh, poor, stupid Logan. Every day I spend alive is a punishment for me.