His hands were numb. It was rare for it to be this cold in Beacon Hills, but the cold weather hit them, and it hit them hard. He leans over his lap as he sits on the bench outside. His hands are so dry they started to crack. The blood has long but dried by now. He stares at it as a reminder of what he did.
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He sighs rubbing them together trying to warm them, but he soon gives up he doesn't deserve to feel the warmth. That's why he is sitting outside in the freezing weather instead of inside the warmth of the hospital.
He can't bring himself to sit in there. He feels like he is suffocating inside. It's his fault you know. He hates himself. Everything was going smoothly and then it wasn't. It happened to fast even for their enhanced abilities.
He lets out a shaky breath and watches as his hands shake in the dark. He doesn't deserve to be here. He bets, no he knows everyone in their hates him and is most likely plotting his murder. He shakes his head. He deserves it, all the hate they hold for him he deserves it.
They didn't trust him as it is, hell he barely trust himself. He let this happen. If only he had tried harder, they wouldn't be here in this mess. The breeze begins to pick up and it nips at his open flesh. His clothes are basically ruined, rips covering the material letting the cold air bite at more of his skin.
He deserves it he reminds himself, he doesn't bother asking for a jacket or a blanket to keep warm when he deserves to feel the air nip at his skin painfully. The voice in his head yelling at him telling him how he is a monster and just killed the one good thing he has in his life.
He is so focused in his thoughts he doesn't hear the other wolf come up to him until he feels him sitting on the bench next to him startling him out of his thoughts.
Derek gets tired of the arguing in the hospital between the pack and heads outside to look for the missing wolf. As the door of the hospital opens, Derek is surprised how cold it had gotten since they had arrived earlier in the afternoon. Now with the sun gone the cold air bites.
Derek looks around for a second before seeing the wolf on a bench outside the hospital starring at his hands. As Derek gets closer he sees that Theo doesn't have a jacket on, only his ripped clothing. He shakes his head before sitting on the bench next to the wolf startling him from his thoughts.
Theo, it is too cold for you out here man come on inside. Theo shakes his head. I don't deserve to go in there, they all hate me or are planning my murder they don't want me here especially not in there with them. I know none of you guys trust me and I know I'm not a part of the pack and I let this happen. I destroyed the only good thing I had in my life. I won't bother the pack, but I am going to stay out here until the doctor gives word back.
I need to know if he lives or not. He whispers out. As if he is afraid of what the doctors call will be.
Derek watches as Theo talks, the teen is fighting off tears Derek can tell. He also sympathizes with the teen. He has been in his shoes before, with his sister Cora and with Stiles. It took a long time for Derek to fully trust someone after everything that went wrong, and it also was a lot for him to accept the fact that it wasn't his fault.
