Muddled Love

Confession Time

There's always a reason for something, and it's definitely not because of fate or some heavenly being out there. If you think about earthquakes, there are plate tectonics moving below and sometimes, there is too much pressure so the plates might slide against one another and cause an earthquake. What about being born? A woman and a man decide to have sex and then keep the baby. So now here's my question: why in the world am I still single after twenty-five years of living? Twenty-five years as you can guess is my current age.

I don't know how many times I have searched online for twenty-five and have not kissed. Fortunately, there were enough hits to make me feel slightly better until my sister who I love and hate at the same time has to remind me, "So do you have anyone that you like? Have you met anyone new at work lately? What about that guy that you said was cute and had asked to lunch?"

Yes about that guy, he did go to lunch with me and then proceeded to ask me about Alexandra Newman, the prettiest paralegal at our law firm. Regarding the question of who I like, there really isn't anyone. I haven't felt my heart skip a beat for a human being for a long, long time. The last time I did was during my second-year university exchange to France and I fell for a Korean guy called Jung Seunghyun. Sadly, I only fell for him after he got tired of me, and so nothing came out of it. Plus, there was no way that I'd be relocating to South Korea when I was aiming to go to law school.

Now that I'm out of law school and have been working for a couple of years at my law firm, I should be able to have a relationship or at least get laid. I know the issue isn't my looks; I have had men confess to me or be eager to get to know me at first. It's only after that they know me do they shy away or run off from me. I'm starting to think that perhaps my personality is awful. Maybe I am like Blair from Gossip Girl, though I do like her fashion sense.

So here's a Saturday night that I am spending at my apartment with an Asahi beer in one hand and fried chicken wings in another while thinking about my reason for being single when all of a sudden, I hear pounding at my door. Knowing this erratic rhythm of pounds, I head to the front door and open it to find Lucien Von Altdorf rushing in.

"Close the god damn door!" he barks at me. As I slowly obey him, I hear a woman shrieking his name down the hallway. Immediately, I turn to frown at him, causing him to stammer, "L-L-Look, Gem, I can explain."

"What did you tell that woman this time?" I grumble.

"I just said that I didn't want to see her tonight and then she followed me all the way to your place," he clarifies in a breathless tone.

"And why are you coming to my place? You know that I hate last minute surprises . . ."

"W-W-Well . . ."

His trailing voice lets me guess what has happened, so I share with him my conclusions: "You were actually going to go on another date with this other woman you met, so you used me as an excuse."

"Bingo!" He even has the audacity to point at me with both of his hands mimicking a gun. "The winner goes to Miss Gemma Fan!"

"You're such an ass, you know that?" I groan.

Before I can complain more, the woman continues to yell, "I know you're in there, Lucien! Stop hiding and man up!"

"Yeah," I scoff and cross my arms. "Stop hiding and man up."

"And you said I was an ass," he murmurs.

"I'm just repeating the truth," I correct him.

"Sure."

I shake my head, reminding him, "You shouldn't piss me off when I'm the one giving you refuge. You're technically the refugee here in my domain."

"Can you not make me sound like some starving orphan from a developing country?"