VULNERABLE HEARTS

• the world had drained him

[ THE WORLD HAD DRAINED HIM ]

— i think it's really sad to see someone you care and love about or anyone suffering and going through something you can't help with.

there was this really
cheery boy at school,
he cracked jokes and
laughed all the time,
i wish i was happy
like him.

then i thought, be friends
with him, he seems nice,
and that's what i did.

i talked to him at lunch,
he smiled at me and
we immediately conversed
in a conversation that drew
me closer to him, and just
like that, we were friends.

everyday for six months
we would go at my house
and do homework then
do a marathon of shows
we loved, until one day
we didn't anymore.

he didn't come to school,
i tried calling him but
he wouldn't answer, i
started to worry, what
happened to him? i thought
really hard of what the
problem could be.

after a week of him being
gone, he appeared again,
he looked so worn out
and tired and i didn't want
to press out some answers,
he looked so... dead.

that day, i came to his house
as he left after lunch break,
i knocked on his door and
i saw which i assume is
his mum answer the door,
she smiled at me and
wrinkles appeared at the
side of her eyes.

i asked for my friend and
she told me to come in
and go to his room, i
already knew where it was,
and as i opened the door,
i couldn't help but cry.

there he was, lying on the
bed, bleeding through his
arm, a razor at the floor
near his bed and an empty
bottle of pills by the edge.

i didn't know, i never did,
and i was an idiot, did
his mum know about this?

i heard a gasp behind me,
it was her, she didn't know.

she immediately called for
an ambulance and i tried
to shake him awake, i shook
my head in sadness, no use.

after the ambulance took him,
his mother and i went with him
and after a few hours we got
to see him, all patched up, and
an iv sticking from his arm.

his eyelids open and stared
at me in shock and i walked
up to him.

why didn't you tell me?

i was afraid you'd see
me tattered and broken
and thought you'd leave
me all alone by myself.

i shook my head as a no,
i would never leave him,
i couldn't help but think
that his happy aura was
his mask of hiding away
his pain and hurt, he tried
to mask it with smiles
and laughter and i couldn't
help but cry at the fact that
i wasn't able to help him.

please don't do it again,
i'm here for you okay?

i hugged him as best as i
could without hurting him,
the world had drained him,
it had drained the life in him
and i wanted to blame everyone
who had hurt him, and i blamed
myself because i wished i could
turn back the time and help
him before it could've led to this.

it's okay, i'm going to be okay.

i never thought i could've
nearly lost someone who
i care and love about in this
way, never again.

never again.

[ THE WORLD HAD DRAINED HIM ]

this was really sad and emotional i cant, i wanted to nake this chapter because i know there are plenty of people who have a façade to hide away their pain and i just want to say that never be afraid to ask someone for help, and never be scared to ask someone if they are really okay twice, no one should feel lonely, the world is a cruel and beautiful place, but we should stick with each other and help esp in those dark moments we have.