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2.FEELINGS

 JOY'S POV

"what's wrong with today you Joy? what are you dreaming about?" asked Erin. She was talking about something but I was not listening. I was not myself since that encounter with him. He turned my perfect life upside down.

"sorry I was just thinking about something" I found my voice coming out like a whisper.

"I bet she was thinking about a guy" Noelle said while laughing. she liked to tease me and get on my nerves but in the end I always  end up laughing   to whatever she said.  

We have known each other for about six months but It feels like we have been friends for a lifetime. Passing time with Inna , Noelle , Hannah and Erin was the best part of university. it was impossible to be in their company and not have fun. Like everyday we were having our lunch break. I was serious and that what got their attention , because I was always the optimist and always smiling. today was unusual.

"come on Joy, tell us who is he?" said Inna with a serious tone.

"he Is nobody" I answered angrily.

"I told you she was thinking about him" said Noelle with a grin in her face.

"no I wasn't thinking about him, he isn't worth to be in my thoughts" I was getting mad , with them who wouldn't stop talking and pestering me to tell and mostly with myself. I really haven't been myself since that awful moment that I met him. these eyes have been following me..

"tell us Joy, or you are you still thinking about the mysterious guy?"  Erin interrupted my thoughts. the girls were teasing me now.

I got angry and I walked away from them. I wanted to be alone and to cry. They were calling after me to stop but this time I wasn't . I put me headphones and my favorite song started playing. 

"you are the song that rose again in my life

the second coming of my youthful dreams..."

I didn't know where I was going, I bumped at somebody but I didn't care at this moment I just wanted to leave.  I kept walking till I found myself in the park of the school. I sat there and after crying my heart out and letting all my frustration of this past week away, I felt amazing. the tears are the words of the soul, they are 99% feelings and 0,1% water.  I felt relived and finally came to my senses.

I felt renewed and started singing. I loved to sing and  always wanted to be a famous singer, to express my talent and to show others the artistic side of mine that only a few people knew but sometimes fate was very cruel.  But I have always been that type of person that looks on the bright side of life. I will never give up on my dream, I will fight, and that was a promise that I have made to myself.

I was singing a song , lost in its words and melody. that was the best therapy for me, being lost in what I loved with nobody disturbing me. I was singing when I heard a noise. I decided to ignore it and continued singing louder this time. And again the same noise interrupted me. It was strange because rarely students come to this side of park.

I grabbed my bag and headed towards my friends, it was foolish of me to walk away like that. I owed an apology to them. They were joking like we always do, but I was not in the right mood and all because of him. 

I didn't want to lose myself over a boy, that wasn't my  intention. I was only concentrated in my studies. Why was I overthinking about him? He was just like other boys, feeling powerful and if they are beautiful ,they feel like the whole world was under their feet. Just like that arrogant that I bumped into.

"sorry for my behavior girls , I was just feeling a little emotional today" I apologized as soon as I arrived to my friends.They were looking They were concerned and I can see they were worried about me.

"Joy are you okay" asked Hannah.

"yeah I am fine. I just wanted to be alone for a while."

"do you want to talk about it?" asked Inna looking very serious.

"not now girls some other time maybe" , I didn't want to  talk about it not because I didn't trust my friends but it was better if I left things like were and maybe he wont be anymore in my mind all the time. Maybe his memory and his beautiful eyes would fade away.

After the lessons we were heading home and my mood now was better. We left behind all what happened today and we were joking like always.

"so what's his name?" asked Noelle unexpectedly.

"Noelle seriously " we said in unison. 

"Ok ok just tell me is he good looking?"

"Drop it " I said smiling. Now she was joking and I loved that about my friends because they knew how to make me feel better even when there was a storm happening  In my soul.