Beyond Hate

Fourteen

ZARA

We hadn't seen him, I hadn't seen him. He just left. And for some unknown reason I felt down, I felt guilty and useless. I never got the chance to at least talk to him or tell him that I'd miss him. I never had the chance to tell him that I was not happy he was leaving. I hadn't even cried like everyone. Worse was that we hadn't spoken. He must have thought the worst of me. Ene stood by the corridor, beside me. Her hands rubbing nervously on her skirt. She was scared and so was I. Jerome had told her he wanted to tell her something concerning Toby. I had no idea what it was, but I was scared too.

"He's coming." Ene murmured.

I looked towards where her eyes was fixed. Jerome sauntered towards her direction, his hair had grown out and his head was no longer the spot light. He offered a smile to Ene as he approached us and a nod to me.

"What did Toby tell you?" Ene attacked immediately.

"He didn't tell me anything per say, I only over heard his dad saying he'd leave this school if they weren't called back in two weeks."

Ene hit her thigh angrily. "I knew uncle Kiisha would suggest such a thing!"

I stared at her. At least she still got a chance to see him. I wonder why she was so, so angry and sad - I didn't know how to explain that perhaps she was reacting too much.

Jerome sighed. "And only God knows when this indefinite suspension would end. They could call them back after a month or so."

Ene shook her head. "That's too much."

"It's still indefinite. Anything can happen." I blurted.

Ene sighed. "I just pray this doesn't happen. I don't know.. It's just so sad."

We stood there in silence, watching people walk past the corridor. The SS3 block was dry for the most part. It had only been twenty six hours since the nineteen boys left and everything was so dull. Couples weren't talking at the school clinic area after night food and before night prep. It was as though all the boys in relationships were dragged home. Everything was different. I don't know how long we stood there, but I was only pulled out of my reverie upon seeing Kelvin walk up to Ene.

"Hey," he waved at me.

"Hey." I nodded.

He exchanged pleasantries with Jerome before he launched into his talk with Ene. "I'm sorry about your cousin."

"Yeah. Thank you."

"I heard you've been balling your eyes out since..."

I tuned out of their conversation soon enough. Nothing interesting came out of it. My hands subconsciously grazed the Rolex on my left wrist. I stared down at it's glittering stones. I hadn't told him goodbye! I wondered why it really made me feel guilty.

"You miss him."

I creased my brows upon hearing his voice and understanding his statement. "I guess so."

"You like him."

"I like everybody."

"You have feelings for him."

I groaned loudly. What was with the statements. He wasn't even asking questions, he was simply stating out thoughts as though they were obvious and then waiting for me to affirm his suspicions. "What is this now. Twenty questions?"

"I'm just saying." He stated calmly, slipping both his hands into the pocket of his trousers. " everyone knows he's been trying to woo you since the beginning of the term. And everyone knows you guys act like an item yet you haven't confirmed if you like him. We aren't sure if you do."