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calum propped up his dirty, black chucks onto his windowsill as he placed the messily rolled joint between his lips and brought his lighter up to light it. he smiled in content and inhaled deeply, then puffed the smoke back out towards the window in front of him.
he didn't smoke weed often, he knew it wasn't good for him, not that his cigarette habit was any better. and he knew he shouldn't do it as much as he had been in the past few weeks, but he couldn't seem to help himself. the high it gave him made him feel more relaxed than he had in a long time.
whenever calum got high, he let his mind run wild. he enjoyed his self much more when he was high much more than he did when he was sober, or even drunk. everytime he was drunk he would catch himself doing crazy things he would never have interest it otherwise.
he did think a lot more when he smoked though. he thought about things he would never think of if he didn't smoke, like if dogs all bark in the same language or if you can cry underwater. he also thought about things he found rather hard to avoid in any state of mind, like what his life would be like he had chosen football over music, or mila.
he thought about mila a lot. all the things he had done to her, all the things he said. he wondered about her too. he wondered if she had moved out of their shared apartment after he did. he wondered if she still went to their favorite diner for breakfast every week.
sometimes he even caught himself scrolling through her social medias, or even typing a message to send to her. he had been trying to think of something to say to her for weeks, but considering how stoned he was all the time, the only thing he could think of was asking if she had already found someone to replace him.
he silently wished she hadn't and was suffering as much as he was. although he didn't like to see her hurting, it felt a whole lot better than thinking about her sleeping with another man, before he even had the chance to apologize.
he pulled out his phone and scrolled through his contacts until he found her name, he considered calling but figured it was a little late to call someone, especially someone like mila. he clicked the messaging icon and sighed.
he typed out a simple 'hey' before deleting it and tossing his phone on his bed.
almost on cue, a knock sounded on his door. calum jumped from his seat,
"come in," he muttered as he flicked the blunt into the ash tray.
"hey mat- jesus cal. there's so much smoke in here!" his roommate choked out as he waved his hand back and forth in front of his face. "you really gotta cut back,"
calum rolled his eyes, "whatever you say, luke. what do you want?"
"just making sure you're still alive, you haven't left your room in days. and now i know why, you're living off your stash." luke sighs at his friend, "i wish you could get over her man."
calum groaned and sat himself on his bed. luke only shook his head before turning to leave the room, clicking the door shut. calum throws a pillow at the door angrily then picks up his phone.
he quickly sends a message to contact it was open to.
"thinking about you lots lately.."
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aaah! chapter one! sorry this absolute crap, i rushed a little bit so i could have something up.
!!drug/alcohol abuse warning!! i apologize, i forgot to address that in the very first part :/
i will try my absolute best to have a second chapter up asap! but as of now i really hope you enjoy!
:)
